Do you get annoyed by ignorant people?

I can't stand the ignorance of some people. No your milk can't just dry up after a week, it's not physically possible, if you are breastfeeding you are producing. But even more than the breastfeeding issue, I personally think a mom has a right to do whatever she chooses is best for her and her child, be it formula or breast, I do both and I'm not a fanatical about either, the cry it out method is what boggles me. In fact, I actually get really passionate about it. I asked a question almost like yours a few weeks ago. My friend who's daughter is a month older than my son (my son is 12 weeks) asked me if my son was sleeping through the night yet. I said no not yet, he's breastfeeding at night and wakes up every 2-3 hours to eat. She pretty much insinuated that my son was "abnormal" because he has yet to sleep through the night, and her daughter sleeps through the night EVERYNIGHT. She's also a formula fed baby and formula fed babies stay full longer, sometimes all night long. She's also not co sleeping with her. She's also uses the cry it out method. This friend of mine said that for the first two weeks of her childs life she was hell bent on getting her baby on a sleeping schedule. She puts her down in her crib at 9 pm, lets her cry herself to sleep and the first few years of her life, she also would let the baby cry when she woke up in the night for food. So eventually Hannah started sleeping all through the night (after about 2 weeks of doing this method). Of course she'd continue to sleep all night long, what was the point in waking up if her needs aren't going to be met, if she's not going to be changed, fed or just held and loved? Rachel (my friend) told me a few nights ago that Hannah woke up and she was just sooo upset with Hannah for waking up in the night. What a spoiled brat of a mom! Heaven forbid she has to wake up one night to take care of her new daughter! I really think the cry it out method is neglect, borderline abuse. These babies are new to the world, that's their only voice. How would we like it if we screamed and cried and pleaded with someone for hours and were shoved into a cold dark crib and ignored?? It's horrible and heartless! A mothers instinct shouldn't even allow her to do it, if you can lay there and listen to your baby scream for hours on end and not go to them, I doubt you should be a mother to begin with. I know how harsh that sounds but isn't it harsher to use this method with innocent babies when this is the only voice they have to communicate with us?

Just my opinion on the issue, I do get really frustrated about it. After this huge long conversation with my friend, I basically told her that I could never leave my child to just cry alone no matter how much it inconvenienced me. Its my job as a Mommy to take care of him, even if it just means holding him until he falls asleep :o).

The cry it out method is just an excuse for lazy parents to sleep through the night, babies are designed to eat every few hours, they aren't designed to sleep all night long the first few months. Long answer I know.... good question!!

In general, when dealing with other peoples bad parenting you really do have to have a thick skin, cause what does making a scene really ever do? People like that just won't care that what they are saying is not FACT, they will argue till the cows come home in an effort to justify their disillusion. I think you did the right thing. Better to come vent where lots of women will agree she is a bad mom ~CAUSE SHE IS!~ then to argue with a dumb%^s at work.

From my experience, (breastfed #1 for 19 months,and currently an 8 wk old) the boobs take over. Anyone who has breastfed knows thats just not what happens. I wonder if maybe her Mom felt a lil guilty?? hehe just a thought.

I think "crying it out" is ignorant, to me it's common sense, if my baby is crying there is something wrong. There is no reason a baby should be left to cry. A baby is incapable of learning any kind of lesson from being left to cry. It just makes them crabby unhappy babies. My opinion.

In terms of how I handle misinformation masked as advice, it really depends on who the person is. Nodding and smiling is always useful if you don't want to get into it, but I sometimes will say "my doctor says allowing young children to cry for long periods of time isn't healthy as it raises their stress hormone levels." Or whatever fact you happen to know.

I don't know how suddenly milk can dry up, but a major stress (death in the family, eg) could seriously impact production. Also, if her mother was scheduling feedings, supplementing, etc. that could seriously impact supply as well.

Most ignorant (and heartbreaking) thing I've heard recently (from MIL): "The baby only cries during his circumcision because he's being held down."

The more confident you feel in your parenting choices, the less justification you'll need in order to prove anything. It must be hard, though, to hear things that clients do that you know are factually wrong or harmful to babies.

Wow. Poor baby :( I hate hearing my son cry for a few minutes let alone two hours...

I honestly think some woman just aren't very maternal. I personally don't understand how someone could listen to their child cry out for them for that long.

I had a friend who lived with her mom and said she would get mad when her mom wanted to pick up her son while he was crying she said "he should cry alone for a while, don't you think?"

I said "I don't let my son cry, if I wasn't able to get him I'd have had my mom pick him up"

She didn't really say anything back to me, just changed the subject.

I try not to get too annoyed when I here people say completely ignorant statements. I either try to "gently" correct the errors of their ways or bite my tongue!

Ignore them, sounds like you are doing a great job with your daughter!

And no, I've never heard milk drying up after three kids, sounds like an excuse (or lie) to quit breastfeeding in my opinion.

Honestly, I think the most ignorant thing that I have ever heard is a mom that thinks she knows it all.. Not saying you do, but keep in mind that anytime you are having a conversation with anyone, you don't know whether you are right or she is right... People are just carrying on conversations, and the beauty of it all is WE DON'T ALL THINK ALIKE. I think letting your baby cry for 2 hours is extreme, as I don't consider that "controlled crying." But, people have different opinions on breast feeding, and you should recognize that and move on. Don't assume you know it all, either. And take peoples' input and form stronger opinions for yourself. What is for one may not be for the next..Move on and appreciate diversity.

TODAY, my hair dresser and I exchanged numbers and are going to hang out and bring our kids together! I am so excited, and I was wondering how often hair dressers form close relationships with their clients or dislike them... kind of weird! I can also see that she and I have a lot of differences, but we're both moms, close to the same age, so we'll share different opinions and have a good time....

In response to your additional comment to me: I agree! Pretty much, like I said I think anyone who thinks they know it all is the most ignorant. However, under certain circumstances, you bet someone's milk supply can possibly diminish no matter how many children she has had...........It's really dependent on the circumstances,,,

Well first of all you had me rolling... "OMG The poor thing!!! Thats what I was thinking, 2 hrs!!!! No wonder she sleeps through now she probably thinks why bother shes not going to come" That is sad, but I found humor int he way you said it. How terrible.

And I'm not so sure about the drying up deal. My mom nursed her first baby for about 3-4 months and dried up. She claims she had little support and motivation. She tried with my brtoher for 2 weeks but being a SAHMilitary wife and two babies practically back to back she quit that. Then with me she knew she would not nurse at all and she said she actually had the worst time drying up. She got mastitis and all kinds of infections because her milk came in so strong.

SO i'd say it was just coincidence and ill misfortune if this lady had no milk with ehr third baby.

In regards to ignorance: I work at a police department and as of tonight my officers have done a million traffic stops BACK TO BACK, wanting me to check EVERYBODY AND THEIR BROTHER on the warrants list (takes forever) and it is just never ending. I'm irritable today! My guys have no concept of the fact that not only am I entering their stops but i'm also taking phone calls and crap. argh, just one of those nights!

Sorry I had to vent! lol

A lady I work with told me I need to stop letting my baby suck on me and get her on formula cause it's making my baby clingy. I was so annoyed. I can't stand people who tells me what to do. I will choose what's best for her. Also my FIL tried to give her water at 2 months and I was told by our ped water is empty calories and it can harm her kidneys which aren't developed enough to handle water. I had to put my foot down. I don't think someone's milk can dry up. It's supply and demand. Must not be feeding on demand.

Arggghhh bet you were pissed.

People like that piss me off to no end

I always get told tips that i think god ill never do that

I think you handled it well i would have probably gotten cranky and cut her hair crooked at the back as payback lol Or oops sorry there goes your fringe it will only take 2 hours to cry about it i am sure you know how to cry it out...

Wow im nasty huh

I'm not going to pretend to know about the milk drying up, but I can't believe the lady who let her daughter cry it out for 2 hours! She is setting her baby up for emotional problems if she keeps doing that...I know you had your reasons for keeping quiet, but I wouldn't have been able to help myself.

Probably the top ignorant thing I usually hear regarding children is the people who believe you can spoil a newborn by picking them up every time they cry. That just gets under my skin...even if you could spoil a newborn, so what? Hold your damn child.

I don't know anything about breastfeeding, but can't say I've ever heard anyone say the milk dried up after three kids ~ that makes me laugh!!

And the crying it out for 2 hrs? Unbelievable. People like that are the nuts who love to give advice, aren't they? I'm with you... ignore it, privately disagree and know that she's waayyyy off base. Aw, that poor baby. :-(