bipolar ex gf, why does she already have a new boyfriend?

Mike, i hate to say it but youve got to get on with your life.

I know how your feeling honestly, when you first posted about this it was when my bi-polar husband had left me. I must admit we have had some hard times too (think i posted to you before) and a few weeks ago we decided to give it another go.

Till last night when i found out hed joined a dating site.....oh he says he didnt really want to meet anyone but it made me realise we cant do this to ourselves forever.

My husband is opposite to your girlfriend in the respect that when hes manic he wants me there, he has big plans for our future together, and then when he gets down again he shuts himself away and wont talk to me.......he starts to blame me for all thats wrong in his life and he cant even see when hes upsetting me.

There comes a time when even though it hurts you have to start to cut away from people........its wierd as a love my husband so much it hurts and he says life without me wouldnt be worth living......but i know i cant take much more of the strain.

Bipolar doesnt go away, its there for life, your girlfriend will always be like this.......do you really want to keep putting yourself through this? You sound like a lovely caring fella, but it wears you to the bone. Ive been there for my husband, ive gone to him whenever he needed me to, i ve begged and pleaded with him to talk to me at times......and all the good its done me so far is for me to end up on anti depressants and sleeping tablets myself cos i honestly feel as though im living on a knife edge.

Your girlfriend, like my husband, is using you like a crutch, she wants to live her life her way but she doesnt want to quite let go of her crutch just in case she decided she changes her mind.

I think nows the time for us both to make fresh starts........lets stop being doormats to their ever changing emotions, they are never going to give us the stable secure relationships that we want (and i think deserve!)

Who knows wht the future holds for us both, maybe when we start to live our lives again our other halfs will eventually realise what theyre throwing away......

good luck xx and positive thinking to both of us xx

First of all, DO NOT believe her when she says that 'you can keep her sane'. She's emotionally manipulating you, believe me, I do this stuff every day. She feels there is a need for cheating and lying to people because radically speaking, all human beings are crap and worthless, so they don't deserve any better. I mean that's what she might be thinking, because I do think that sometimes. She hooks up with people because she may feel 'afraid' alone - empty, worthless, without reassurance but at the same time she might not even like the people she surrounds herself with, it's just the fact that they are company...She uses you because she knows that you love her - don't let her do that, because you'll end up being really hurt. She knows that she can get away with anything she does, because she has her excuses. Also, I'm sorry to say that, but there is a very low chance that she actually loves you - how do you know she doesn't say the same to all her exes and random people she hooks up with? It's very hard for bipolars to be able to accept and give love. Also, they have a way of exaggerating feelings for one - she might hate you in the heat of moment then the other she's all over you again. Her emotions are 'unreliable' along with her judgment - that is a certain aspect of the disorder. She cannot control herself when she has manic episodes, because, well, it's hard to explain, it's a feeling of emptiness, numbness, lifelessness, I don't know - a need to 'get out'. You cannot blame her for that, it isn't something she can control but it could be if she took some medication. Only thing you can do is convience her somehow to get treatment. I hope I helped with the insight.

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Many girls break up with their significant others, is because they need time to figure things out. Don't take it personally, if you want her back, you have to show her you can help her. If you love her then you'll let her go, that's it. Not everybody who you date in high school you end up staying with, the chances are extremely unlikely. So if she doesn't want to, then you need to let her go.

This is coming from someone with bipolar and similar behavior.

I think it would be best for you to stay far away from her if she keeps hurting you like that. She has an illness that she should be seeing a doctor for but she has to WANT TO get help. you are going to keep getting hurt if you stay around, trust me, I know...I have done this to people in my past because I could get away with it. I am older and different now, and on meds, so I am not that insane anymore.

You need to think about yourself.

i know the perfect book that you should read.it will help you SO much

its called "manic" by terri cheney.its a memoir.it talks about her boyfriend and alot of other things that sound like your gf here.heres the link for it

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0061430234/...

it really goes in depth with the disease

and jst advice:i know its hard but you need to stickk with her through the manic times becuase when she is depressed, thinking of you will make things worse and she may think to suicide.

also, she NEEDS medication.manic people should not jst be roaming the streets.they could really hurt themselves

i really hope i helped.

and good luck!

She is mentally ill. Bipolar is a serious disease. No meds means erratic behavior. The illness controls her life. It has been controlling yours as well. You could benefit from talking to a mental health counselor.

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