Did I completely ruin his life?

What you did was wrong and I pray you learned your lesson from it. But what your ex is doing now is his choice about how to handle his hurt. That is not completely on your shoulders.

Yes, he is mourning the loss of the relationship and is probably experiencing a lot of different emotions but many people have been cheated on and they don't completely ruin their own lives because of it. He has probably gotten himself into a deep depression (at least that is what it sounds like to me). And if you know he is doing this I do believe it would be a good thing for you to talk to someone who can reach out to him and help him get his life back on track.

And remember, we are all human. We make mistakes. That isn't an excuse to hide under, just a fact. If you learn from it and remember how you are feeling, what he is feeling, next time you will know how to make the right decision. The only mistakes are the ones we don't learn from. Don't beat yourself up too much about it. Have you apologized and tried to make amends? Helping him out now by getting his loved ones involved can be one of the best ways to make those amends to him.

Don't think you ruined his whole life. You just ruined his life so far and his chance of ever trusting another woman in the future.

Besides that all is fine with the boy.

Was the other guy that good?

Just stay away from the poor guy. He obviously got a dose of growing up from what you did. And now in jail he is getting a dose of something else.

He is not goody two shoes now. He is a very mean, angry guy. Congrats...time for you to move on to the next sucker.

BC

I suspect that he would have ended up in jail if he had never met you. While you 2 were together he was on the straight and narrow, but once you split he had no-one to impress or to guide him, and that's where he ended up. Sure, the cheating was bad etc but you could have broken up for any reason and he may have gone the same way. I do find it a little strange that he was so much younger than you, at that age.

how long did you guys date? did you love each other? well, you obviously didn't love him, but did he love you? what you did was bad, but what he did was stupid and immature. cheating has happened to everyone. you just hate the person, give it some time, and get on with your life. maybe now you'll think twice before cheating. if you want to mess around with someone else, just break up with with your bf. it's a lot easier than sneaking around. or if you just stay single you can see whoever you want. just make sure you let the guy know you're not looking for anything serious at the moment.

It is not your fault. Cheating on him was wrong and a betrayal, however, we all have to suffer betrayal in our lives. It is how we deal with it that shows our character.

By all means feel guilty for letting him down and cheating on him, but don't feel guilty about the choices that he has made in his life.

It sounds like you feel very bad about hurting him, but remember, everyone makes mistakes. I get the impression that you will never do anything like this again.

Take care

Was it his fault you cheated on him no it was a choice you made, So it is the same thing with him deciding to quit school and start drinking his choice. He may use you as an excuse for his actions but that is all it is an excuse.

Well we all have to take responsibility for ourselves. Yes it was wrong for you to do what you did but he has to be his own man. His good life should not have been ruined because of what you did. He had issues already and what you did just added to them. Getting his life back on track is his problem not yours. Keep in mind though what we do to others do have a way of returning the favor.

Sweetie, you are only responsible for your actions.

It is not your fault and don't take responsibility for it. You made a mistake and people do that, and if he couldn't deal with the repurcussions that is his problem. Chances are there was already something inside of him that you didn't see to have gotten this far.

You can not take responsibility over someone else's actions, he did what he did because he can't handle his life for himself.

That was really a terrible thing you did, cheating on him. No question. It sounds like you may have been the tipping-point.

But the thing is, we all have disappointments and set-backs in life and it is how we all deal with them which determines are success.

Don't ever cheat on anyone ever again.

Sorry to say, quite possibly. He has a criminal record now - which means in many places he can't get insurance, buy a home or borrow money. He's less likely to get a good job (or any job), and he's indulging an addiction. Oops!