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My wife left me for another man?
As stated my wife left. She decided she wanted a separation. She had an affair two months ago. we tried to work through it and she couldn't do it. so she tells me she wants to separate in hopes that will fix things. However a couple days later she tells me she still cares for this other guy and doesn't know what she wants right now. we talked about it and I understood. we decided that for the separation we would not date anyone till we figured out what we want to do. last night though she went to tell her brother and his family about the separation (I am close with them) they call me about 2 minutes after she leaves asking me if I want to come witness this for myself because she called told them we are splitting up and want them to meet her new boyfriend. So I went over there and hid in the stairway down to their basement and sure enough she comes over with him. She played the "poor me" card on them saying I don't pay any attention to her and spend all my time in front of the computer which I'm actually barely in front of the computer at all and sitting on the couch with her. What actually happened and her reasoning's to me for all this was that we grew apart and she always felt like things would fail so she never bothered to try. So after they left I text her and asked her to come home and made up a lie about how I found out so she wouldn't get mad at her brother and his family. I told her that when she text me asking me where I was going that it struck me as odd because she had left a few minutes before me so I drove by her brothers house and saw the guy in there with her. Which of course made her mad which in turn made me mad. So we argued for a bit and then calmed down and talked rationally. In which once again she told me that we had grown apart and that she cared for this guy. i asked her why she told me that she wasn't going to get involved with anyone till she figured things out and here she was already introducing her family to her new boyfriend. She said because she was confused about what she wanted and didn't want to hurt me and said that she may very well be gone a few days and realize she needs me. I replied telling her that I should be in the know of these things because i can't be the back up guy for is things fall through with him. we talked for a while longer and it was revealed to me that she didn't know where he lived and he didn't know where she lived and that the one time they had had sex they met up at a hotel room one day while I was at work. She refuses to tell me anymore than that even though i'm glutton for punishment and want all the details she just says it's none of my business but if she decided she wanted to work things out then she would tell me everything. as far as not knowing where the guy lives puts me into suspicions that A) the guy is married B)has a live in girlfriend C) doesn't want anything serious and will toss her aside once he gets bored even though he pushed for the relationship. At this point even though I love my wife and I truly want to spend my life with her I know that it's not something I can pursue because she has repeatedly lied to me. My question is how do I move past all the hurt and anger I am feeling? right now it just seems so overwhelming and I miss her so much. which is insane because it's obvious she has moved on with her life even though she says she hasn't moved on 100% yet.
thanks for the answers. some of you anyways.....I was giving backstory of what has occurred and just wondering if there was any helpful tips on moving forward. Unfortunatly I guess it always comes down to time
Oh no I have already decided I'm not going to initiate any contact with her. i've decided I'm going to do my own thing even though the pain is immense right now and i stay sick to my stomach. So far i've just been steadily telling myself that with or without her i will make it. Trust me it was tempting to come out of hiding and jump the guy but out of respect for her brother and being his house I bit my lip and stayed put because he didn't want any trouble there but wanted me to be able to see it with my own eyes
32 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Forget her, then. She had latent slutty behavior within her from the start, anyway. You can do better, bro.
- SheilaLv 45 years ago
Although a breakup with a boyfriend or with a girlfriend can be really depressing, it does not need to mean that the relationship is over. Even if the breakup should suddenly leave you feeling confusion and loneliness, you may still feel really eager to heal the wounds and jump right back in to that relationship with your ex. If you are asking yourself "How can I get my ex back?", then there are some things you need to know. If you learn how to react following a break up, and you become aware of how not to strain the relationship even further, then getting ex back will be easier than ever.
If you're wondering, can I get my ex boy friend back by pretending to be this way or that way? Then you have to wonder why you want to be back with him anyway. You might be better off finding someone who doesn't make you need to pretend.
Well, there's no guarantee you'll get back together, but the odds tilt more and more in your favor when you do things right. Show her how much you miss her, and how sorry you are. Just pay attention to what she does. If your gestures of sorrow only make her angry-she throws away the roses or something dramatic like that, for example-change your tactics until you find that something she responds to.
If it appears she/he is moved on, still send her/him a card you wrote just wishing her/him a great week. But don't look as if you have any expectations. Your thoughtfulness might really impress them.
"What should I do to get my ex back?" Be on your best behavior and make your ex remember what drew them to you in the first place. They'll remember your good points and will miss them. Then you'll have a better chance of being able to get back together with your ex.
These are just the beginning steps in winning your Ex back. They are the initial steps I followed when I lost the love of my life. And frankly these aren't my original ideas. I turned when I had no idea of how to get my true love back.
Still feeling hopeless and frustrated? Want to get back together as soon as possible - maybe TODAY even?
There IS a hope - and a good chance of reconciliation for you, so act on it - or you lost them forever!
- ?Lv 45 years ago
The first thing to do is to let all your emotions out. Surely, if you want to get your ex-girl or boyfriend back, he or she means a lot to you then you must love her/him, very much, so you are hurt badly. Well, shout let it all out! Do not be afraid to cry if I want to. Perhaps you want to have a smoke or a drink even if you never did before? Well, it won't do you any harm. Just don't fall into hard drinking, because that way you will never have a chance to get your ex back.
If you wish to visit to know more about..(Getting Back With Your Ex) you can do that here
- Anonymous6 years ago
This Site Might Help You.
RE:
My wife left me for another man?
As stated my wife left. She decided she wanted a separation. She had an affair two months ago. we tried to work through it and she couldn't do it. so she tells me she wants to separate in hopes that will fix things. However a couple days later she tells me she still cares for this other guy and...
Source(s): wife left man: https://biturl.im/jew3K - How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
- 1 decade ago
It's a cliche but only time will get you through this. Seeing your marriage didn't work and seeing her lie that way must be more than you can bear. Just give it time and try not to torture yourself too much wondering what's between your wife and that guy... whether he loves her or he doesn't doesnt really make any difference to you. All those thoughts are only going to hurt you even more. I can't imagine what one feels in a situation like this but I hope you take it step by step and if it's really over, can get over it eventually.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
I am really sorry for you. In my opinion, when a person is dishonest will always be dishonest. Would you be able to live with a wife who is repeatedly lie to you and would you be able to forgive even a very big mistake. If not,just move on, don't even think to make up with her, she doesn't deserves your love. Try to go out with friends and maybe you will meet the woman of your dream. Time will give you a good answer. I wish you good luck.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
it sounds like she likes him for his big bone and dislikes you because you obviously don't have a freaking back bone! Seriously, man up already and lay down the law... No woman wants to be with a needy bit**
A sexy man takes control of the situation...
- 6 years ago
My ex didn't answer my calls, emails and texts. But Now, I have gotten positive responses on both texts i have sent! I’ve been using the TXB system for about a week now.
Source(s): https://tr.im/WnMbk - 1 decade ago
Sounds like she is trying to keep you on the side until she knows whether or not this other guy will pan out. My advice, RUN FOR THE HILLS. She doesn't want to be with you or she would be at home with you working it out. Say this guy falls through she is going to come back begging to be with you and this will happen again. If she was in love with you she would have never strayed in the first place. There are a ton of ladies out there that would treat you right. Don't waste your time on one that is trying to keep you hanging on the line. You shouldn't have to be 2nd choice to your own wife. MOVE ON.
