How can I negotiate a salary?

I had to do this for the first time a couple years ago and, not to brag, I did pretty darned well for myself! Here's what I did. First, I talked to other people in my profession and asked them if they negotiated and, if so, how much over the offer they initially asked for. In my case, I was universally told to ask for 5% over. Then when I called my future boss back, I told her that I really appreciated the offer, wanted to work there, but that I needed a little more because I have student loans and living in a big city is more expensive than the rural area I was in. Giving reasons other than...well...greed helps. Then I gave her a firm number. Guess what! It worked and I got what I asked for. Later, I checked what my colleagues make (I'm a state employee so I can do that) and I was right on!

Now it's not always that easy. If they come back at you with a counteroffer you need to have already planned what to do. So ask yourself, "What's the minimum I'll accept." If you're in a situation (as so many of us are nowadays) where you'll accept anything I would just accept the counteroffer as long as it's reasonable. In other words, quit while you're ahead. If they don't offer you any more, it's likely because they can't. So then you'll have to decide whether or not to accept.

Now this is already too long but I'll say one more thing. Even if they won't raise your salary there are other things you can negotiate for like moving costs, extra benefits, sometimes you can ask about a job for your spouse, free parking, and even company car or cell phone. So even if you don't get a bigger salary there may be room for other things. Just be politely firm, explain yourself but don't be defensive, be professional, and you'll be fine. Just remember it's your prerogative to negotiate!

Step 1: Reflect

Look in mirror and assess your strengths and weaknesses. Be honest with yourself. Two of the biggest mistakes people make when negotiating on their own behalf are to ignore their failures and weaknesses and to underemphasize their accomplishments and strengths. Make a list of each and commit it to memory. Your existing employer is already aware of items on both lists, so use the strengths and be prepared for the weaknesses.

Tip: Individual strengths and weaknesses are valued differently job-by-job. If you’re interviewing for jobs, highlight your most relevant strengths for that job. Also, if you’re looking for a raise at a current job and you're concerned about a specific weakness, look for ways to address that weakness such as training programs, books, or even asking your boss for advice before the negotiation itself.

Step 2: Prepare

Nothing can sour a negotiation more than an ill-prepared employee or candidate. If you are trying to negotiate for a higher salary, do your research and find out what an employee like you should be making. Talk with recruiters, your peers and visit salary websites, such as www.salary.com. Also make sure that you have a good understanding of the company’s policies on the salary or benefits for which you are negotiating.

Tip: Gather and organize all necessary documentation and facts, such as transcripts, prior reviews, current salary, and salary expectations, so that you don’t have to struggle with facts and figures during your negotiation.

Step 3: Prioritize

Many people overlook that fact that total compensation is made up of numerous components – it's not just base pay. You’re more likely to get what you want if you know what you want most. For some it's base pay. For others (e.g., sales people), commission rates are more important. Entrepreneurs will focus on stock or stock options. Still others, such as second wage earners, find health benefits or flexible work schedules are the most valuable component of compensation.

Tip: Knowing what’s important to you sounds simple, but it requires some thought. You might even find it worthwhile to give up on something less important to get something more important.

Step 4: Present Your Case

Make an appointment with your manager or human resources department – preferably before budgets are set and reviews are done to give the employer an opportunity to plan ahead. Discuss point-by-point what you can bring to the organization as an employee and take time to highlight specific major achievements or special skills. Make clear to the employer exactly what your compensation expectations are and why you deserve them.

1. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Successful negotiators are assertive and challenge everything – they know that everything is negotiable. I call this negotiation consciousness. It was Number One on my previous list and it stays at the helm in 2009. Negotiation consciousness is what makes the difference between negotiators and everybody else on the planet.

Being assertive means asking for what you want and refusing to take NO for an answer. Practice expressing your feelings without anxiety or anger. Let people know what you want in a non-threatening way. Practice 'I' statements. For example, instead of saying, "You shouldn't do that," try substituting, "I don't feel comfortable when you do that."

Note that there is a difference between being assertive and being aggressive. You are assertive when you take care of your own interests while maintaining respect for the interests of others. When you see to your own interests with a lack of regard for other people's interests, you are aggressive. Being assertive is part of negotiation consciousness.

2. Shut up and listen. I am amazed by all the people I meet who can't stop talking. Negotiators are detectives. They ask probing questions and then shut up. The other negotiator will tell you everything you need to know – all you have to do is listen.

Many conflicts can be resolved easily if we learn how to listen. The catch is that listening is the forgotten art. We are so busy making sure that people hear what we have to say that we forget to listen.

You can become an effective listener by allowing the other person to do most of the talking. Follow the 70/30 Rule – listen 70 percent of the time, and talk only 30 percent of the time. Encourage the other negotiator to talk by asking lots of open-ended questions – questions that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no."

3. Do your homework. This is what detectives do. Gather as much pertinent information prior to your negotiation. What are their needs? What pressures do they feel? What options do they have? Doing your homework is vital to successful negotiation. You can't make accurate decisions without understanding the other side's situation. The more information you have about the people with whom you are negotiating, the stronger you will be. People who consistent

When you get an offer, you say something like, "that is a great offer, but I was hoping for a salary closer to X. Can we discuss this offer and see if we can get the salary a little higher?"

"Or, that is a good offer, but I really need to be making X. Is that salary negoitable?"

You can also do it more around when they do a performance review which is when they usually raise salary anyways. Just make yourself look good and then let your boss know what you would like to earn and why you think you deserve it.

Don't be the first to bring up the number and don't agree unless it's reasonable.

When they tell you what they are will to give, say it again quietly, and give it a couple seconds and they may or may not give you a higher offer :)

Grab your ankles!