Hello? I really need some help here. Something very bizarre happened this morning. HELP?

Heya,

Honestly I completely understand, although I'm heterosexual, I realise that you seem to be reaching a boundary, it almost seems like you're testing your own limits a little and I think that is essentially a natural part of testing and experimenting with your sexual orientation.

You have to realise that although flirting with a guy online can be fun and harmless, he may end up expecting more from you than a little webcam fun. You don't want to upset him so in effect upsetting yourself. In reality all you need to do is what makes you happy! I know it sounds selfish but concern yourself with yourself, if a guy doesn't make you happy then you don't need to be with a guy or force yourself to feel comfortable with seeing his penis.

The fact that you didn't feel turned on suggests that you are not sexually attracted to the opposite sex, and although his personality and his sweet talk may have had th effect, online you'd be surprised how the same and different gender may not have significantly different online personalities.

My point is you could find a guy attractive online and maybe not even realise its a guy or vice versa.

I would stop talking to him for a while, it seems very much like he has expectations of you and you should NEVER force yourself to meet those expectations and instead choose to do them willingly. If you explain this too him that you don't want to have sex (whether online or off) with him and he pesters you for more pictures and things then I'd strongly suggest breaking things off. You should be able to decide for yourself who you want to be regardless of whether male or female.

If you then go back and re-evaluate the situation, maybe think:

1. Do I like him physically?

2. Do I like him for his personality?

3. Do I like him at all?

At the moment it seems a little much like 3. to me, although he may be charming online it seems you are not attracted to him physically. Whether you are attracted to his personality is unclear but it seems a little to much like your curiosity has lead you to think you might be so you can use him as an experiment in this situation.

I knew a girl who was lesbian and she had sex with a guy and found the exact same thing. She was likewise experimenting with her sexuality, and said she found his penis "uncomfortable". She didn't like it and although she liked him a person, people are very driven into relationships by a combination of both affection and physical attraction.

Anyway, whatever happens to you in the end, I hope it's for the best :)

No matter your sexual orientation the webcam just adds another level of awkward to sex...even when I'm dating people I feel weird about cybering because it's just a lot more comfortable if the person is there rather than a video. Instead of hot it just feels weird to see someone on camera that you know... o.O; Porn stars are different because you don't know them, but if it's someone you've talked to... eh....well.... Sometimes it just makes it awkward.

And if there's no real spark in the first place...double the awkwardness!

However there are some guys who just hear what they want to hear and nothing else and this one obviously has the wrong idea. You might let him know that you're just into the friendship aspect before he becomes completely infatuated with you or you could end up with a stalker type situation on your hands. Only pursue it if you want it or if you're going to feel regret about it later. ^.^; And there are super nice ways of turning people down... you're creative, you'll think of some. ^.~

v_v; I feel like I've now said awkward enough for a lifetime.

Your husband is displaying the signs of an abusive control freak, and this is reiterated by the fcat that he is telling YOU that you're the weirdo for not thinking this is normal behaviour. He is trying to control you. And he is also putting emotional pressure on you and trying to make you doubt yourself. And he's working too, otherwise you wouldn't be asking this question. Not all couples call each other throughout the day, some don't at all, and like you are happy to wait until the evning together to catch up. watch out for other signs too like him hiding things from you, and then putting them back later,tellling you they were there all along. Or changes in his voice or accent when he speaks to other people. Or very discreetly (drip-drip technique) being negative about your friends or family, which, after a few years of him doing this, results in your social circle being reduced to almost nothing and you feeling very against all the friends you always had. Contact your local womens aid group for further support or advice on this matter. I would like to be wrong but your situation sounds a lot like mine. And it ended up getting quite scary without my even realising it.

Awh! You poor thing. V__V You know...i really am not sure what to say. I've never been in this type of situation, so it's hard for me offer advice. So i will tell you the one thing i DO know:: I am myself, i am very attracted to guys. BUT...i am NOT attracted to all of them. If some stranger over the net...even if he was hot...was pushy, pleasured himself to me, "revealed" himself to me, and then begged me to strip for him, well hell! I would be disgusted and turned off too! Why in the world would i be attracted to someone like that? He's gross, and it seems like he may have manipulated you a bit. So. I wouldn't make any decisions based on your sexuality from this experience alone. You may just not have been attracted to him. And i don't really think your sexual preference is something you should "test". Cuz that just about always leads to trouble. I think if you really dig deep, and do some self evaluating...you'll figure out your feelings. Good luck with everything, kay? <3

I'm not sure why you are beating yourself up over this.

This guy is living out a fantasy, it really has nothing to do with you personally. Whether he could see you on your webcam doesn't matter, because in his mind you are simply "a girl" and he is clearly desperate for some sexual attention.

You aren't interested in this guy, so you should just stop. Don't worry about hurting his feelings, you don't owe him anything. You were nice to him, and that just feeds his fantasy that you are his dream girl and the next discussion will be about plane tickets or something equally ridiculous. Trust me and don't encourage this.

Just cut it off. If he begs or whatever, just say, hey, I'm just on email casually, I'm not interested.

You are not responsible for his lack of self-esteem or for massaging his ego. This is the danger of the internet for young people who don't know how to set boundaries and get emotionally involved.

You have zero responsibility to this guy for anything. It is perfectly acceptable to just block him and move on. Let him find somebody is on the same page as he is.

well although usually i think people's sexuality is not very clear when they r 16,,, but i am pretty sure u r lesbian...

I mean if u felt sick... then probably you r... as long as its not just a one time thing...

i dont think u r bi...

anyway ... you can just tell him that you are... its not a big problem.. just dont make it sound like you hated what he did... tell him you are just not confortable with this kind of thing... if he objects then he is only some guy u met online

anyway :D be careful online there is a lot of crazy people out there!

Heyyyy Haruhi darlin' XDD

I was about to chat with you on Y!M when I saw your Q =D

Damn that really was something O_O

lol >.<

I think you should tell the guy that you're a lesbian, so you're not attracted to him sexually in any way.

He should understand that. Just be straightforward about it. There's no need to hesitate as to what to say. Just tell him that he's not your type! Literally XD

It's quite simple really. Just tell him that, because you're gay, you're not turned on or interested sexually.

But mention, that you won't mind being just friends with him, and see what he says.

~~Bye Emi baby <333

I'm gonna continue chatting with you now, and give your more details ^______^

You were uncomfortable by the fact that he's a guy, or you're just not used to this stuff? Answering this will help clear the haze off your sexual orientaion doubts.

By the sounds of it you are 100% lesbian because you never want to see c*ck again.

I am gay but I know when a girl is sexy, doesn't mean I'm straight.

Look away from the screen? Tell him you're okay to be friends but nothing more? Tell him you're in a relationship, even if you're not?