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moved my wife back to her hometown after i lost my parents,now were on the edge of divorce 2months later?

Both my parents passed away at the first of the year,my wife (of 16 years)is from another state and it was a six hour drive to see her parents and family.after my mothers death i told my wife that i would not let her suffer like that and wanted to get her back to her family no matter what while there was still time.in the process we lost our house due to foreclosure and had to move to an apartment here ,i also had to give away 2 pets that i was really fond of among other personal things (you know home owner stuff,etc) she is working again here but does not make near as much money as before and i am on disability and my whole check goes for bills.i don't know anyone here except her family.Her family is real nice to me that's not a problem at all,but my loss of parents, friends,pets,my house and bill collectors on me at every turn has me really stressed out plus we only have one car and she takes it to work most of the time,and all she can say is "don't worry about it so much"that's her answer and claims that she cant stand to be around me anymore.she works and grocery shops and does some house work but i take care of every other aspect of our lives,she wont even pump gas or talk to bill collectors.plus she denies causing any of this and says its because of me,when i try to talk to her about it and my concerns it always ends with her yelling and saying she is getting tired of my sh---.we also have a teenage son with special needs and i am also going through alot with the school over his special education,she hasn't talked to them at all about it.-i don't mean to sound like im wining but,how much more do i have to do...

Update:

by the way my diability is 3 times what she makes,she stayed at home while i worked 2 full time jobs for several years,thats part of the reason im on disability.

4 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Both of you are having stressful times. I bet there is still much within the marriage itself that can work... try to find some counseling through maybe disability or some other professional that takes a sliding scale so you both can get your heads back together.....

  • 1 decade ago

    I am so sorry for everything you're going through. listen... a woman's mind is traditionally set from birth that when she's married she will be taken care of... it doesn't matter how long the marriage has been formed. the changes in roles... you not working and her out in the workforce being the main bread winner... losing your home together etc... it's a lot of stress for her, too. at this time of so much transition it would be wise to seek marriage counseling to help each of you cope with these changes and realize that you are still a team... even though right now it may not feel like it. you've invested a lot of years and a lot of effort into your marriage. if she says she's sick of it-- you need to get to the bottom of it. her issues may run deeper than what's being said. much luck to you. hope it all works out. I'm so sorry about your pets, too. the homeowner stuff can be replaced but I know how sad it must have have been to see your animal friends go. keep your chin up. these are tough times for many of us.

  • 1 decade ago

    If your wife aint talking to you she is talking to someone! I suggest going for marriage counseling to get the communication. Maybe she resents the fact that you are not working or mayb she is just as stressed as you about the bills and all that! People react differently when they feel the weight of the world.

    Be gentle and loving and try some therapy!! You can't change any just yourself and if you cant make her listen then you need help from a neutral party.

  • 4 years ago

    i actually am so very sorry for you and your spouse's loss. there isn't something greater durable than the inability of a toddler and for some couples it may deliver them closer jointly or aside. on a similar time as you have the excitement of yet another toddler coming quickly it is overshadowed by using the inability of your son and the uncertainty and nervousness that neither of you are able to bond and enjoy this time jointly with the aid of fact of what ought to ensue. precise now you're nonetheless very vulnerable and this co-worker is a lot out of line to not basically attitude you as a married guy yet individual who remains grieving for a son on a similar time as looking forward to yet another. on a similar time as i'm particular she's providing you with the attention you is probably not receiving out of your spouse you would be making determination in accordance with a short-term choose. Please proceed your joint counseling and open up greater at those sessions inclusive of your spouse and notice in case you are able to artwork in direction of connecting that bond as quickly as lower back without the concern of what can ensue yet enjoying what's nicely right here and now. could the reminiscence of your son carry all of you jointly in love.

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