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why my husband doesn't love me and our 10 months old baby?
my husband left me .it's hard to understand why.i met him when we were still in school.i left my school and i got a job to can pay for his school.i kept him 2 years in police school, i took care of him, he cheated on me and i found the power to forget.he treated me awful every day.i loved him and i was doing everything just for him, he was my life.after 7 years he broke up With me.i was devastated...i tough that if i will have other relation With somebody else i will get over.it didn't happen, i was loving him more then before.i realized that i couldn't live without him. he came back to me, promising that he is not gonna make me suffer anymore and he will never remember about the other relation that i had.was good 2 months and after that the inferno started.i got pregnant, but it didn't matter, i was crying every day because of him.i gave birth of a Beautiful boy.everything was perfect for other 2 months and after that he was totally different. he always had something to say against me just to make me sad.i was doing everything in the house, taking care of the baby, everything.was no respect anymore, no love, no nothing...just his best friend and the beer.he didn't care about us anymore.he hit me in front of our baby and he sent me out of the house yelling allot of bad words to me.he said he doesn't want me in his life anymore ,period. i tried so hard to bring him back cause i love him so much but he doesn't care about us ..he doesn't even want to call to see if the baby is ok. he keeps lying everybody to not be seen like a monster.why ???? i was sleeping 2 hours per day to do everything in the house and night time at work like i was fresh...why??? i feel like i can not live without him.even if i wasn't happy i want my family back.i want to raise our baby with both parents ,not just one. why does he want other life??? he had all that a man could want. somebody who ever loved can act like that ?
10 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
This guy is not capable of love in the giving sense. He has a ton of issues & problems that YOU cannot fix.
My honest advice is, STOP BEING A VICTIM & get away from this guy. Otherwise you will only teach your son that treating women this way is ok & he will find a woman who thinks that getting treated like trash is all she deserves.
You never had a "family" or a "perfect" time with this guy. You do not even love this man. You love the idea of what you could have had, & you mourn the loss of that ideal - it is normal but it WILL go away. You need to move in with your parents or support system & stay away from this man.
He will NEVER change, & will turn your son into a wife beater who will end up in jail or worse. Call a local battered womens shelter if you need proof.
- funngirlyLv 41 decade ago
I'm sorry but he just doesn't sound like much of a good guy. You teach people how to treat you and you were a doormat, You slaved, got little sleep did everything for him. He can't respect someone who doesn't respect themselves.
Why would you want someone who treats you so bad. That is the main question here. All these problems and you decide to get pregnant and then are surprised by no happy ending?
You need to leave him alone and don't date until your son is 18. You've screwed up your life and have terrible taste in men. Just stop. Once you had the baby you don't get to fixate on YOUR feelings, what YOU want, YOUR crying. Me time is over. Your son is the priority. Think he deserves such a crappy role model for a Dad? Get a lawyer, get a divorce and get child support. Get a life!
- 1 decade ago
I would love to give you a "black or white" answer to your problem but unfortunately, there really isn't one. There are several issues here ,and just one answer doesn't apply to all of them. First and foremost you need to accept that this man obviously isn't the same person you fell in love with. Life changes all people and sometimes it doesn't work to our favor. At this point it's not going to matter to him what you do or don't do, he seems to be pretty much "checked out" of the relationship. RED FLAG>>> He has advanced to physically putting his hands on you in anger. I hope that I'm not wrong in saying that you seriously aren't so naive' that you don't already know this is a "toxic" relationship? You sound like a smart woman that's just afraid of what the "unknown" holds. I was you once, and what gave me the courage to go forward and leave my "bubble" of comfort was having a child. By doing that you should now be baseing all your decisions on what is best for the both of you. Although you may feel--for some reason--that you don't deserve better than this man ,by deciding to stay the way you are ,you are now implying that your child doesn't either. I know you're hurting---badly---on the inside, but you can turn this whole situation around to be the first , of many, great things you do for yourself and your child. I know it's scary being a single parent and being out on your own but there are alot of resources you can look into for shelter, food, money, that will help ease that worry.As for you>>>you need to find something to do for yourself that will make you begin to see "the you" that deserves so much better than what you're getting. You have to find this person within yourself first, before you will be strong enough to take the journey you will be taking. Somewhere along the way you seem to have lost "you". Try to plow through all this other stuff that has happened and remember who you were in the very beginning. Good luck to you in whatever you decide.
- 8Lv 61 decade ago
You have to love YOURSELF and only accept being treated with respect before any man will love you or respect you. You don't love yourself. If you did, there is no way you could love a man that abuses you and has no love for his own baby. More and more cops are monsters that kill their wives it seems. A lot of them have mental issues from their jobs and take it out on their families. IMO, the job should require full time mental evaluation.
Source(s): Know a ton of law enforcement - How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
- 1 decade ago
You really don't need him in your life. I know you want him to be there, but if he hits you what to you think he will do to your son? Think about it. You can do a lot better. I know you don't want to hear that, but you need to. You can do it. Just forget him. If he wants to leave let him. File for a divorce and child support. You need to do what is best for you and your son. It sounds like you are a really good hearted person, so go find someone who will treat you right.
- 1 decade ago
look the man don't want you go ahead and live your life. raise your child and find somebody that will treat you right. love comes and goes and he will always treat you like you ain't noyhing because u let him do it.
- 1 decade ago
im going through the same i got dumped like i was trash a few days ago, and he was abusive to me and i always gave him chance after chance and now HE has had enough i have no advice for you becuz my feelings are raw to. u jus have to wake up everyday for your children thats what i do evern when i dont want to wake up. oh and i hear the best thing to do is dont contact them but i no thats hard.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
very very sorry to hear this
men can be very very ignorant
maybe he doesnt know what he is doing is wrong
just talk to him about it
and if things dont get better find a man that truly loves you
- Anonymous1 decade ago
it seems that your husband is a narcississt who only cares for himself. you have been busy taking care of all the family affairs,while he was busy having his own affair instead of appreciating what you have been doing for the family. you and your children deserve a better life
- Anonymous1 decade ago
sorry to hear that
talk to him about it. good luck