Is payback sweet or just wrong?

I have been blessed with one asset that no amount of money can buy. I have a lot of friends. My friends have referred me to great schools, terrific jobs, advancement opportunities, apartment and condo deals that nobody off the street would ever hear about, and invaluable advice and help on matters of the heart.

About six months ago, I started a very painful process of separating from my wife of six years. After six years of being a working househusband and no sex, I had enough and she fought the divorce tooth and nail with her lawyer. There were not real assets to fight over, no children thanks to her refusal to allow me any, but just to win an argument that left us both losers. She has gone back to live with her parents and continues to make my life miserable and I see more of her now than when I was married to her.

Anyway, I digress. I got some tips from some of my friends to check out a couple of on line dating services.

I met Jackie there. Jackie is a very attractive woman who also has a list of problems that if you measure each by a value of one dollar could equal or surpass the size of the National Debt. I was lured in by her blond hair, her light, bright eyes that change color like a German wolf (a warning sign I completely ignored), and a curvy body that seemed to send smoke signals to every straight guy to drop every thing they happened to be doing and save her.

My blond flower and damsel in distress started to wilt by the second week but we remained friends for two months. After having too much to drink on the second date, and when sober Jackie said she would not even kiss a guy on the second date, there we were changed out of our street clothes into sweats sitting on her couch in her living room after dinner. I leaned over to kiss her on the lips, and then Jackie whipped out a list of demands, a honey do list, of things she wanted taken care of before I went any further. How a woman can down four triple shot cocktails, and three glasses of port wine, and hold her liquor enough to hit a guy with a verbal assault like that has remained a mystery to men going back to the days of Salome.

Like Salome with Herod, giving Jackie half of what I had was simply not enough for Jackie. She wanted heads on plates as tokens of my love for her.

She had a list. Her ex boyfriend, who had become a raging alcoholic under her spell, had given her mink coats (as in more than one), diamonds, white gold (not just that cheap yellow 24 karat stuff), a Mercedes that was in need of repair due to female abuse and neglect, his job (which she was fired from due to poor performance but somehow managed to collect unemployment from. Thank you, Massachusetts), and on and on ad nauseum. Jackie's ex boyfriend sued her for $15,000 and she managed to cross her legs at the male judge like Sharon Stone and the case was dismissed. Men. Idiots who lose their heads over pieces of tail like Jackie. She no doubt returned the favor on the old judge for his judicial act of kindness and all the more reason judges need more accountability and term limits.

After two months of Jackie's head games, I had enough. It was time to bring in the troops in to rid me of this Nazi in a skirt. As Edgar Allen Poe said in the "Cask of Amontillado," when (she) ventured upon insult, I vowed revenge...and there must be punishment with impunity."

It was time to give Jackie a taste of her own medicine for all the dates she called at last minute to cancel or just never showed up. It was payback time. This time I intended to screw Jackie in a much different fashion and I succeeded beyond my wildest dreams.

I have a black friend of mine who looks like a professional football and basketball player. This guy is a 6 foot ten inch tower of power that is many a white girl's sexual fantasy. He has no interest in white women but is curious from a racial stereotype point of view as to why white women find black men so fascinating. So I siced him on Jackie.

He created a profile on this on line service and the simple act of him visiting her profile page sent Jackie chasing after him like a love sick teenager. She was emailing my black friend five to ten times a day and making a complete slut of herself over this guy whose only interest in her was a curiosity about sexual racism and to help out his long time friend. I helped my buddy create a profile page that looked so much like Jackie's own page he could have passed for her black male alter ego. Same career, same car, same love of sports, photography hobby, lived and worked in the same cities, and so forth. It is simply amazing just how dumb and gullible a woman can get when she is lead by her tail by some stud she has the hots for.

In this case, Jackie was lead to her favorite Italian restaurant for a blind date with my friend. She gave him her number but she didn't question when she asked for his number he did not give it out. She went on the date anyway. We waited at the restaurant for Jackie to show. It was li