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Punishment for a 9 year old stealing, take away christmas?

My 9 year old son has been stealing a lot this year, normally the punishment has been to take away tv and video games, and ground him. However, this seems to be getting old. He is in the middle of a two week of no tv/computer/video games and just finished 1 weeks of not being able to go outside. My wife and I have stressed to him that stealing is wrong, and he willl get no attention for it. We have taken him to the police station so that they could talk to him and let him know that as he gets older he could end up in jail. Well this morning, my wife caught him with chocolate in his sock draw. We are at a loss for his punishment. I have suggested giving a lump of coal for christmas. But I hate to take away such a special holiday, but as an adult, or even a big kid punishments for criminal activities do not take breaks for holidays. Please don't say spend more time with him, because we spend a lot of time together and do a lot of family activities. He does most of his stealing at home in the middle of the night when we are all asleep. I have put up a baby gate (he climbs over), laundry baskets full of clothes and stuff behind it, he quietely moves it.

Update:

Trust me we have tried spanking, but that doesn't work, and yes I spank hard enough....one time I hurt my hand.

We tried the explaining, and he is still stealing. We took him to the police station he is still stealing. The only reason I am worried about taking Christmas away is because it is such a special holiday for kids. But if he gets stealing in a year or two outside of the house, then the juvi system doesnt care what holiday it is. We took away halloween this year.

Update 2:

Unfortunately for the first answer, I don't think he has stolen from a store. So that system doesn't work.

12 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    No, this kid needs to have his backside tanned.

  • 1 decade ago

    Looks, like your in a predicament.

    I would say that the first answer was great. Give a bunch of stuff to the needy. Make sure he understands that you are not "punishing him" but rather giving him a consequence for his behaviour. That way he doesn't see it as him being a bad boy needing a punishment, rather he made a bad choice and needs to have a consequence for it. This alleviates some pressure on your child as being "the bad boy." And also gives you some room for reinforcing the positive things your child does. Make sure you give 5 positives for every negative thing you say to your child... because they will only remember the negative!

    Some boys are adventure seekers and will get themselves into trouble.

    If need be (this is pretty harsh) but there are door buzzers that you can buzz your child in. It is NOT locked at all, but an alarm will go off if the door is opened in the night. I'm not saying that this would work for every child (before all the childs rights people jump on me here) but i am saying that if it really gets out of hand then he may need to be Buzzed in. And as things progress and get better he can strive for a smaller goal of not getting buzzed in at night. As he gains that privilege he may not want to lose it again and begin to understand that stealing will lead to consequences.

    If it is at night and you are not with him, this may be a good idea. You can buy these buzzers at home depot etc...

  • 1 decade ago

    I agree with Rebaccah. Christmas comes only once a year. So, yes, maybe you should make him give some presents to the homeless. And/or don't give him his presents until the middle of January. Hide them somewhere he'll never guess so he doesn't steal that too. And if your going to punish him, make it harsh to show him you're serious. Like ground him for a month. If you're REALLY mad at him, you'll probably do that. Hope I helped! ( If he steals again, just repeat grounding for one and a half weeks. Then he should stop!)

  • 1 decade ago

    I agree with the first person who answered your question. You it was good that you did take him to the police station, and have him learn what stealing can do when he grows older, and shoplifts etc. Have you tried using a type of door alarm? That may work, because if it goes off in the middle of the night, it will wake everyone up.

  • Alex
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Christmas comes only once a year, and it isn't fair to take away such a special time of year for something that can be so easily solved. Explain to him that stealing is wrong and tell him that if he does it one more time you are going to spank him. If he persists, show him that you are serious. He's nine and he thinks he's above punishment; well, show him he isn't. Take down his pants and underwear, put him over your lap, and spank him. Guaranteed, he will never steal again.

  • 1 decade ago

    Christmas morning, have him take ALL of his gifts and give them to kids at a homeless shelter or something. Tell him When you steal from a store, the store loses money. When the store loses money, they have to cut workers. So because you stole, now there are people without a job who have to live in a homeless shelter on Christmas. How sad is that? Let's go give your presents to the unemployed worker's children.

    He needs to realize that stealing doesn't just effect him.

  • 1 decade ago

    Well even though im only like 3 or 4 years older than him (im 12 1/2) let me explain christmas to us from our point of view. Christmas to us is like the best time of the year we get to have time with family,get toys,and with our cousins or brothers and sisters we can play with one anothers toys,its the best time of year but if you give us coal you will change that here is how it will go, watch all your other cousins or brothers and sisters play with there fun toys while your sitting there all alone sad and feel like your in jail or something. just let his punishment slide for 2 or 3 days like (24,25,or 24,25,and 26) and then let his punishment go on it is christmas the must wonderful time of year and if you give him coal it will be there forever maybe him hating christmas forever. i know im young but trust me.

  • I agree with the first answerer but I think that ALL of the presents are a little harsh to be honest. Maybe half and make him give them out and work at a soup kitchen for the homeless on christmas eve or something

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I say dont take away christmas. If u feel like you should, give the present to someone else to hang on to. Once you feel that he is deserving of his present, no matter how far after christmas it is, get the presents back and give to him as christmas when he deserves it.

  • 1 decade ago

    If it's that big of a problem, just take him over your knee. Don't take away christmas for the kid, he just needs to understand that it is better to ask before taking things.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Take away Christmas.he needs to learn to respect his parents. And have everyone in your family completely ignore him for about a month, and have him wear "Im a thief" sign outside. Hell hate you for this, but its your choice.

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