Kid 1 Mommy 0 How can I be a better mom to a 3 year old?

Question

How did this happen?  My sweet, obedient and delightful child... changed nearly overnight.  He'll be 3 in January. I'm not about having a robot child, he's just naturally pleasant and helpful.  These days it's no no no all the time (even when he wants something!) he won't do anything I ask especially when it comes to getting his clothes, coat and shoes on.  I stay home with my boys, so we're rarely rushing out the door so I have some time to try things out. So far, I've tried marching, hokey pokey, trying to make it fun, and find that I'm resorting to time out most of the time.  That's not what I want to foster with him.  I feel totally stuck. I have a 1 year old son as well, so my time is split between yin and yang.

We're also feeling a bit isolated with the cold winter weather -- we're outdoor people, but snow play only lasts so long.  Any ideas for indoor fun games and activities (they are not crafty, much to my dismay!) would be greatly appreciated!

My goal is to have a creative toolbox of things to use that will help me get what I want and need without constant fighting, and to pay it forward a bit with having lots of fun around the house until spring is sprung.

Any positive, kind support is welcome -- thank you in advance for your help, mommies rule!

Tamcan · Accepted Answer

Your being a great mom, he just testing you and also learning that no no no goes along way. Keep doing what your doing and it will be better and then he'll hit preteen years and it'll start all over.

Anonymous · Answer

First of all your kid's are not going to be saints all year round. It is perfectly normal for them to act up every once in a while (we're all human) we can't be good all of the time.  As, for some fun things to do with them here is a couple:


Have a tea party
Act in your own play
Have a indoor picnic
Play dress up
Board games
Watch funny movies
Do jigsaw puzzles
Paint a funny picture

Jenpoop · Answer

My dear, this is what happens to every toddler. Most kids are just like yours, sweet and pleasant and helpful. It is very common for kids your son's age to go through this phase. Going through it myself, with my 3 year old daughter. It's pretty awesome, huh? The best thing you can do is be consistent with discipline, show them how happy it makes you when they do as they're told, disguise having them put their clothes on as not an order, but as a bit of freedom (which it is, so it's not really a disguise) and responsibility. Tell him how nice it is to be growing up and doing things on his own. Let him see it in a different light, as freedom and being responsible. Encourage other responsibilities (brushing his own teeth, wiping his own butt, etc.), and offer lots of praise.

But I've always heard that consistency is the big key. Like someone above said, he's testing you. Kids like to test the boundaries and see  what all they can get away with. Just keep consistently enforcing the boundaries.

threenorns · Answer

oooooooh, yeah - do i feel your pain!  same thing happened to me not long ago with my 33mo old.  suddenly, everything was no no no!  so i flip it - "okay, fine - no banana for you" (and now, of course, she wants it).

he's testing to see what he can successfully resist and what won't fly - so if it's really not a big deal (he wants to wear two different mittens), let him "win".  if it's a deal-breaker (he doesn't want mittens at all) then stand firm and stern:  "you can wear your blue ones or your red ones, but you WILL wear mittens to go outside in the cold").

one thing that keeps my daughter occupied is to dump a box (or two) of corn starch into the tub and add cool water to it, mixing it to form "goop".  then toss him in with some washable dyes (powder, liquid, or both) and he'll have a grand time while cleaning and softening his skin.  might come out slightly harlequin but that never killed anybody.

? · Answer

maybe he is just growing and need a little time
hopefully he can be pleasant as he was
maybe just tell him that you love him matter what
or probaly he could be jealous
which is very common
if you belive he thinks that then you should pay more attention to him
he could feel left out or that you don't love him any more or you love your other son more than him
just try to pay more attention to him
like telling stories could help, play with him, take him out, watch tv with him, you know
fun stuff

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Kid 1 Mommy 0 How can I be a better mom to a 3 year old?

5 Answers