which self-defense style is better?

Oh wow. your going to get some books for answers here LOL.

I want to start of by asking how old your children are. If they are around five or six I'd advise waiting a little longer. My son is Five and I know that he isn't anywhere near ready for real dedication to martial arts. Backyard Fu is great for him as he is energetic and has started showing an interest in them. That and a lot of places that take kids this age are nothing but glorified, overpaid babysitters that will not give your children anything of any real value outside of social skills (which can be learned elsewhere for a lot less).

If you want self defense then that is what they need to train. They need to know what it is like to hit some one and get hit themselves. there is no substitute for this, period. There are different training methods on how to achieve techniques though kata/poomse/forms or what have you and these are a great learning tool for many reasons. Some people place more value on these than others but in the end it is about learning a technique then learning how to utilize it and adapt it to the persons body type. Whether it is forms or drills that teaches the technique is not the hugest of difference IMO.

There is not a greater style per se. There are superior training methods. If you take style A and style B and have them compete for who is best but take them from all schools all around the world you will never have one that always comes out on top. There are arts that seem to have more success and this is purely based on who is training more realistically but no style has the copyright on correct training.

I don't live around your area but I think we have one or two that do live somewhat close. My answer will be the same as theirs though. Look around, phonebooks and the internet can tell you far more than most of us can about what's your area. There are some key things to keep in mind in your search. DO NOT SIGN LONG TERM CONTRACTS!!! A general waiver and some basic stuff will be need signed off on but the place that only offers long term stuff is just trying to take your money and your children will get nothing out of it. Find an instructor that you think offers what you are looking for. If something seems fishy, trust your gut and do not go back.

I will go ahead and list a couple of arts here for you to have a red flag about.

The American Tae Kwon Do Association (ATA). These people are known frauds though out the U.S. I don't know if they are in N.J. but if they are just drive on by.

Krav Maga. There is debate about whether or not this is should be considered a martial art. Regardless of that it has one of the best roots in modern day self defense. However it is plagued with schools that teach martial arts looking aerobics and call it the next best thing since Pankration. If you find a good place though it is absolutely worth looking into.

Tea Kwon Do in general. This actually kills me to say as I am a traditionally trained TKD fighter. I love the art more than any other. If you come across a school teaching Olympic style TKD ignore it. If you come across a dojang that teach traditional TKD it is a place you can't go wrong with.

Also remember REAL self defense is not just about empty had techniques. There can be striking, grappling and then there could be weapons, But true self defense is about avoiding conflict and just being smart enough to know how to simmer down a situation. You as a parent are more responsible for that part of the children’s upbringing and can get your children out of more trouble than any class they could every take.

Good Luck :)

Most people here are going to try to steer you to the arts that they favor. When people ask this question, they fail to realize, when it comes down to it, self defense is more than learning a bunch of fancy moves. 99% of physical confrontations can be avoided. The 1% that can't be avoided will be because you are being selected by a person or people whe prey on others. At that point, it's going to take more than MMA, Karate, Krav Maga, concealed weapons training and licensing, or whatever flavor or the month fighting style is out there. If you don't understand human nature, predatory behavior, and know what steps to take to not set yourself up to be victimized, then you are missing out on the number one tool that will help you to actually use whatever fighting skills you learn. Getting those skills involve a lot of self guided research and a change of lifestyle and habits; learning fighting skills is a very, very small part of that. How often are you confronted by "the common street thug" or "someone who took a little boxing"? If that's a common occourance, maybe the best thing to do is stop hanging out where the thugs hang out. Common sense is a wonderful thing. As far as getting in shape, run, go to the gym, go do Crossfit.

There is no best style.

Most people will tell you there style is the best or they heard such and such is a great style,

The style is not important, what matters is how good your instructor is and how you train. The style is secondary, they all have there pro's and con's there are no superior styles.

If you have an instructor that can’t teach you how to fight, regardless of the style, what good would it do you?

Choose a school with a good instructor in the end that’s all that matters, that and how you train.

Its the person that has the ability to fight not the style

Your size, body type and sex has nothing to do with the style you want to choose. People that think that your size and body type determine the style know little to nothing about martial arts

How old they are should be the first thing you need to consider. But anyways, boxing and judo are pretty good for kids to get into. When they're old enough encourage them to get into wrestling in school, free lessons and will give them another reason to keep their grades up.

Jersey has a lot. Muay Thai, boxing, BJJ, Judo, SanDa. Just look in the phone book. I will say this about boxing and wrestling to a certain degree though, make sure they are hanging out with the right crowd in the gym. Lots of people get into those sports for different reasons, and not all of em are good. But nothing some proactive parenting can't prevent.

The other thing to consider is standardization. Boxing, wrestling, judo (esp olympic rules) all tend to be pretty standardized. Different boxing coaches might have their particulars and wrestling might be different is emphasis (folk vs greco/roman) but for the most part, things they learn in one place will be fairly close to whatever they may learn under someone else. So should you move when they're older it won't be such an issue for them to pick back up where they left off in the new location.

As a parent myself, I would advise you to send them to a traditional Karate school. One that is internationally certified. Shito Ryo, Goju Ryu, Shotokan Ryu, or Wado Ryu karate. Don't take a storefront sign that says Karate as meaning they actually teach karate. Ask if it's traditional karate and what style.

Why is this my answer? Because traditional Karate is the style most able and equipped to teach children and focuses on discipline, etiquette (in and out of the dojo), goal setting, and essential life skills for developing children. These life skills, on top of the techniques they learn in Karate, will go a long ways in developing their self defense capabilities.

When they are older they can decide if they want to stay with karate or transition into a more combat related martial art. The life skills and physical skills they learn in karate will carry on with them wherever they decide to go.

Why not other styles, including other traditional styles? Because they are children. Muay Thai, Jeet Kune Do, Krav Maga, Kali, and all such combat oriented styles will not provide the focus on life skills that karate will. Other traditional styles have good life skills education and training to impart to a student, but aren't as well equipped to handle training children and are also a lot harder to find.

I do not train in traditional karate, nor have I ever. I train in Kung Fu. I am sending my 6 year old step-son to traditional Shito-Ryu karate for all the reasons I listed above.

How old are they and I started when I was 8 but I understood the objective of fighting. My whole family is MMA by the way. For most americans start at 12 maybe. I would recommend to start with something basic then blend in another style with it. It doesnt matter what they do. Make sure they practice hard everyday. Make sure they understand why they are doing this.

I suggest instead of the more exotic and flashy "martial arts" that you should sign the kids up at a boxing gym and get them on the wrestling team in school.

You'll get a list from everyone else of all these stupid and impractical fighting systems.

You give them some good experience under their belt now, it's gonna help them out a lot more later on if they should ever need something to fall back on.

But these internet assh0les think they know it all cuz they watch it on TV, believe them and you will have wasted a lot of money and time, and created a false sense of security in your children.

www.KimeraMMA.com

I've used it in street fights, and countless basement boxing matches, and it's done me great. It's right in Northvale NewJersey.

The guy Rob is very nice, and the Brazilian jiu-jitsu coach is a legit guy, he's been through some fights back in his day, and he knows a lot about REAL fighting not about fighting in ancient Japan.

It's boxing and muay thai, and then the teach a mixture of wrestling and brazilian jiu jitsu for fighting if they get knocked down.

i dont live in the u.s but will give u some idea of more of the realistic arts:

jeet kune do (may the best street fighting concept out there)

southern style kung fu (for eg wing chun, tiger, southern mantis)

brazilian ju jitsu (very much ground fighting with punches and )

muay thai (powerful and leg breaking kicks and elbows and knees)

okinawan karate

kempo karate

muay thai, and brazillian jiu jitsu