Difficult co-worker-How can I cope?

It's nice that you are helping with this program, and also that you understand the reasons for your co-worker's need for control, based on her experience with challenged young adults. Perhaps you could ask her to give you a chance to organize one meal by yourself, and let her check it afterwards. Tell her that you feel you've learned a lot from her, and that you think you can do a meal independently from everything she's taught you. I think that will make her feel that you're competent to do some things without constant supervision. Hope it works out!

As you said, she's in charge. She wants to make sure everything goes well, so she oversees what's going on. That's usually what managers/bosses do. She probably has a lot of experience and may have had some with other workers and is playing it safe.

Does she know you very well? You may have to try harder to earn her trust. I don't know the full situation so it's hard to tell.

Be nice about it and don't sound like you're trying to tell her what to do. Maybe tell her you can do a certain job because she's so busy with other things. Butter her up a little. Good luck!

You can't, you have a double whammy; she is used to doing things her own way and she is set in her ways, a very bad combo. Just go along with her and try not to get too upset. She's bossy and annoying.

I think you need to bite the bullet on this one or pull her to one side and tell her exactly what you have said here. That is the only way, i'm afraid.

Perhaps when she starts telling you how to do what, you can say lightly, with a smile "Now, Mary, I'm not one of your students, you know. Trust me, I can do this".