need some help with 42 year daughter?

There's much more to this story than you are sharing. No daughter would act like that without good reason. Nobody likes to look at their actions and think they did anything wrong...it's ALWAYS the other person. Whatever happened, needs to be rectified if possible for the sake of your grandson and the family. Sit down and do a thorough soul seeking and write down what you are feeling. Don't point fingers at anyone. Write down what you think happened from YOUR perspective and how you feel YOU can change them for the better. You can't make other people do what you want. Extend an olive branch via email or letter and no name calling or threats. Family is forever - every family is worth fighting for - good luck to everyone.

Now something else has to be involved here... I have not spoken to or seen my mother in years and it was for a reason that always goes in as "but she and she did this and she said that". Try to reach back wayyyyy into your soul and see what went wrong. Maybe there is a factor in your daughter's life and either she cannot talk to you or may even be ashamed of you but this story does not add up. There are two sides to a penny and clearly her side is hurting from something. Figure it out and then work it out. Feel free to email me when you have more info and I am more than available to help you.

I don't have any kids so I can't say i know what you are feeling but I do have a mother and I know what I'd want from her in a situation like this. I can't say that what would work for me will work for your daughter but it might be worth a shot. Send her a letter or deliver one to her doorstep. Keep it short and say something like " I realize you are upset with me and I respect that. You don't have to speak to me but please write me and at least let me know what I have done so i can understand what mistakes I have made and possibly in the future, if you are willing, I can make amends. I love you and that will never change."

For me, if I were angry with my mom and I felt it was justified anger, I would be more willing to communicate if I felt that she was willing to accept that she might be to blame. I am in no way saying that you are at fault, I would have no way of knowing that, but temporarily taking blame might at least help you figure out why she is so upset....

i can relate but the other way around, im like your daughter .my mom and me have a lot of problems and it all comes down to love, im just not feeling it i try so hard to make my mom happy with me still trying i have to she gave gave me life i love her so mush, more than words can describe.now you seem like a great mom. your daughter doesn't know how fortunate she is, as a parent myself i see your agony don't call her you'll just get hurt i say send her a long email explaining how mush you love her and how you gave her space to be upset with you because love her so mush ,but that you need to see her and your grandson before you leave and that you want to fix things .I write this with a broken heart ,no mother and child should go threw this,i wish her in your arms and please don't forget to say i love you