why do men stay married when their wife treats them like $hit?

Why stay? Usually such a controlling person has the emotionally and/or physically battered spouse thinking these things -

1. Something about themselves caused this. Spouse - "If only I did better, they would love me." Abuser - "You shouldn't set me off, its your fault I did...."

2. They'd never find any one to "love" them, if they left. That this IS the best that they deserve. Often reinforced by the abuser telling them that.

3. Chances are there are also threats to withhold any contact with the child - "If you leave me, you will never see the kid again".

4. Financial threats - "Leave me and I'll take EVERYTHING from you, you will be left with nothing".

All you can do is make him aware of the TRUTH as opposed to what lies she may be feeding him. Information IS power. Help him learn his legal rights, and how to access them. Then you have to wait until HE has had enough. Til then, he's not going to make a move. As sad as that may be.

The legal/financial thing can't be over stated enough. The whole legal and financial system is very sexist, against males. Men are seen as worthless pigs, and women are seen an helpless princesses that need money.

And it's worse with a kid. She can very easily take the kid away too. She can make it hard or impossible for him to get to see the kid. And, again the law will always be on her side.

Other then that, a lot of guys stay as they have no where to go. They figure all women are this bad, so why not just stay.

If he stays the woman wins because she has complete control. If he leaves her the woman wins because she takes all the money, the house and the kid and can control access to the kid. If he leaves her with the kid alone will she take good care of it. He has probably in such a low state of self-esteem that he cannot make a move. You can try to help but this may be a hard.

It's called "Child Support" and is nothing less than the systemic slavery of men.

In 95% of cases the woman has been awarded custody.

The entire system is utterly stacked against him.

You might think that given the high attention payed to "domestic violence" that it would trump normal custody proceeding but it doesn't [because more women than men perpetuate domestic violence so that would not be in their interest and feminist wrote the divorce law.]

Domestic violence counts as 1 point of 12 or 14.

Whereas having custody counts for 2 or 3.

Basically if he works and she doesn't he cannot win custody.

If they both work, she almost certainly works fewer hours so he still can't win.

His options are abandon his child to be raised solely by the ***** or arrange for her to have an accident.

So I don't really see this as about 'growing a pair' when the two options to choose from to leave take you right back to Hell.

That legal and financial " Gun to the head " is a pretty strong deterrent to just walking away.

Chicks usually profit from divorce so it's easy for women.

A guy who loses 1/2 or more of what he has may never recover.

And FYI , it doesn't matter if she's abusive or not , she'll still get 1/2 or more of everything he has.

Hey - I feel bad for this guy. Not sure why he is doing it though. I think that in marriage, people become so dependent on eachother that they do not think that they can live without one another - even in abusive relationships. So perhaps thats why? Maybe she has shattered (not maybe, she probably has) his confidence so much that he thinks that he deserves to be treated this poorly and that he cannot hope for a better life since he isn't worth it. He needs to speak with a therapist.

The best person to answer this question is your friend who is going through this .... may be he is simply afraid of breaking the relationship or something may be psycologically incorrect with that guy in which case he should seek the advise from an expert.

Know what? I have seen this before and when women treats us good is boring. and when they are bitches we are happy. Well it depends may be she is the one who takes care of everything. as long as you get the milk for free no need to buy the cow. Like lions do.

As long as you get fed and clothes washed who gives a ****.

low self worth

there are also women like that

abusers prefer people like this so they can beat them down and feel better about themselves.

pretty sad isn't it