I`ve been divorced for 3 months, on my own for 5. Is it too early to start dating?

You got a divorce for a reason.. if you had cheated on him during the marriage that could make other people turn their head around but after a divorce... who cares anyhow...you can date the day after the divorce ... We live in the 21st century. In Victorian times it was a ''must'' for a widow to wear black for at least 5 months and then dark purple was maybe allowed but she had to wear black for a long time and then purple and openly show signs of widowhood for 1 year.. where in fact one can love someone very much and really grieve over that persons loss and wear any colour .. the wearing of black and to show the outside world one is mouring is just silly.. what one feels inside is what matters.. At least those rules of society no longer exist... Some women may want to wear black.. Queen Victoria wore black for almost 40 years... after her beloved husband Prince Albert died...but that was out of choice.. She wanted to withdraw and that gave her an excuse, she went to her castles outside of London .. away from the crowds and stayed there for great lenghts of time...

One can also think of a loved one and mourn them not at their grave but carry them in ones heart forever... and you can date after 5 months of having lived alone..

My best friend's niece is doing something reprehensible right now.. she got married after a long relationship with her partner.. end of September of this year.. (that was their registrar wedding). They had a church wedding in early October.. now she called for a lawyer and wants a divorce and she is in love with her ''husband's best friend and ...well that's not so nice...she is only 21 and married 2 months and wants a divorce and her husband already moved out and the lawyers have been contacted .. but they have to be separated for 1 year before the divorce can be legalized...but she is serious about it... so why did they marry.. ? Love can't exist and then die in just 2 months.. it can disappear or one can drift apart over time.. but not in 2 months.and no, he is not abusive to her...she has lived with him for 3 years before and was happy enough to marry him.. she fell in love with his best friend..x

No, their ain't a wait time. I came got out of a 5 year dating and 3 years of marriage relationship. When she did something I didn't like and I told her the first day I met her, if she ever did drugs, I would leave her, doesn't matter if we are dating or married. Well she broke her promise so I left, the same day I found out. Within 3-4 months, I found the love of my life, we been together for almost 4 years, 4 years in July. We have our little problems here and their, but we still love each other.

So to answer your question's.

"I am so afraid of people`s judgement"

You shouldn't be, you only live once. So enjoy life, who cares what people think. If you like him then give it a try. Stop wasting time, cuss you ain't going get more.

"Is it cruel to make him wait?"

If he really likes you as much as he says he does, then no. If my girlfriend wanted me to wait for her to be ready to date again, then I would. Even if she wanted to take a break for a good reason.

"I am not sure if I am thinking of going out with him due to ''loneliness'' or if it is because I truly am ready?"

Theirs only one way to find out...

Enough time has passed. Unless the reason you got divorced was because of infidelity on your part. If that is the case, there will never be "enough" time after the divorce. People will talk regardless.

But, if that is not the case it's time to get on with your life. It's never a good policy to live your life based on what others may think. One day you will realize that no matter how small you town is or how much you love and respect someone and value their opinion they will never truly have your best interest at heart as we are all, deep down, self centered and narrow minded. Its just a basic human flaw that helps us survive.

There's absolutely no guideline for dating following divorce - you can whenever you are ready, or feel ready, there is no waiting period. And, if it doesn't feel right then just give yourself more time, but if you have an interest in someone, well, it's time to get back out there. Nobody can say when one is ready or not - in fact many people start dating even before the papers are signed. You are no longer married, go for it.

It's not too early to date. You should start dating when you are ready to. Who cares what other people think, it's your life. And 3 months a while so it's fine. And if you do think it's due to loneliness you'll know within a few dates if you're really ready. I say go for it! Good luck.

Well you shouldn't care what people think of you cause your your own person!If you really want to start dating go ahead! BUT is this the man that is right for you?If he is think your not being reasonable in a aggressive kind of way then I would want someone that cares about my opinion .And you should talk to him about this but if he doesn't care then hes no good.

No, its not to early to start dating as long as you feel comfortable, about dating then go ahead, dont take other peoples judgement!

My cousin and I got divorced at the same time, she was married longer than I was and she is already dating, and I can't even wrap my mind around wanting to date or trust another person as long as I live. I think the difference for her is that she has lived where she lives her whole life, she knew this man before and had a friendship with him for years, so building trust was already there. Her husband cheated on her and moved in with another woman before they were even divorced. I really don't think it matters, if you are ready and he is, then go for it. I spent too many wasted years in an empty, loveless marriage, I think you should go for it and be happy and say screw it to everyone else. Be honest with him though, if you are ready to date, then date, if you are not sure, it would only be fair to tell him you want to take things slow. New year, new memories, new traditions, go for it..

I have no experience in dating but I think you should start again. Also who cares what others think! As long as your ok with it, then that should be fine ^-^

I have to verify the legal position. I will consult my lawyer. In the meantime can you please elaborate the point i.e. I am not able to catch the meaning of "...on my own for 5". It is not clearly understood.