How do I bring up wanting to have a threesome?

Hi Bridge,

I am going to answer this question based on my assumption the question of how to bring up the idea of a threesome with your friend and then how do you find someone. Bringing up the discussion of having a threesome is never easy, it is at best an inexact science, and I feel it is more of an art form of knowing how to time the discussion correctly. This means by bringing up the discussion it will include a risk to your friendship that may forever change it and it means, that you need to consider are you willing to loose a friend over a threesome?

If you are willing to take the risk then the best idea I can give, is to bring it up when the two of you are doing something together. When you do bring it up it is important that you are clear about your reasons, understand any attraction that you may have for her, and how you see the friendship returning after the threesome. For you it will mean that you have taken some thought on the subject and have an idea of how it will work.

Now, if she agrees then the next issue if finding a guy. Realistically it should not be a guy that both of you know and it should be someone that the both of you can agree. Most likely it will mean that there will have to be some discussions regarding the type of guy, establishing boundaries regarding contact with him afterward, and accepting that not everyone will acceptable to the both of you. As a result of this need it will mean the both of you will need to be good at communicating, be assertive with each other, and work together to find someone that works.

This brings me to the question, where to look? There are many places for the two of you to look and probably the best place to start is on line. On line there are literally thousands of sites that cater to this and you need to find one that works. From there the two of you can post an ad and begin screening the contacts. If privacy and discretion is a concern then you need to state it in the ad that being discreet is required. Then those who you make further contact with it is important to reinforce that point. Does this mean they will be discreet? No it does not but it will go along ways in ensuring that they will and understand a boundary that you have been established. Finally, it goes without saying that threesomes carry risks and it is necessary that you understand what they are for you situation in order that they can be mitigated.

In any event I wish you the best and hope it works out for you on your journey.

Seriously almost no guy would refuse an opportunity like that. As long as both of you are at least mildly good looking just ask a guy and he will 99.9% say yes.

Finding a willing guy is NOT a problem, it's most guy's fantasy. Is it possible to keep it a secret? Well that depends on you guys, doesn't it.

I would bring it up jokingly just to see the reaction... then say "well do u think we could consider it?" try not to make him feel like hes not doing it for you but that its just something you'd like to try. good luck :)

you don't bring it up. it'll happen on its own.