move away from my son's father or stay around for him to not be apart of his life and hurt him emotionally?

Depends on the custody situation you have set up with the court.

EDIT: if you have nothing in writing then legally it doesn't matter. But he may be inspired to haul you into court and get himself some visitation and rights with a paternity test. Or he may just stop paying child support since he has no rights.

You have every right to move, especially since where you're at right now is continually stressful. It may be hard for you to remove your son from his paternal family, but in the long run what matters most is your state of mind, and mental, emotional and physical well-being. Your son will be most directly influenced by you, since you are his primary caregiver. Trust me, if you move 5 hours away, or even further, your son will not truly suffer. I'd encourage you to keep in touch with his grandparents, and keep dialogue open for when/if his father decides to be part of his life, but don't try to force it. And don't cause yourself sleepless nights worrying about "what if my son doesn't have a dad..." He will be much better off with one happy, stable parent, than he would be with two unhappy, or unstable, or miserable parents.

I wish you and your son the best of luck.

**Edit: Just a note, it sounds like you have a support order, but no custody order. I would highly suggest you get yourself a custody order, just so you have it in writing. Without it, whoever has physical possession of the child has custody, and if your ex were to decide to take your son for a visit, and not give him back, the police would not be able to do anything about it.

You need to move on with your life (your son is your life) If you feel that it is not a good situation for you and your son to be in, then Id say move. Don't just move because you want to get away form the drama. Drama follows you where ever you go, Move only to better your life and your sons.

If he is not really stepping up now, chances are he may never. you can still be in contact with your child's other side or his family through the phone nad pictures. Its only 5 hours you can also make a trip back or that can make a trip to see you.

Check with the courts before you move.

GET AWAY FROM HIM! I left out people like that when I had my son. Later on, tell him the whole story and tell him if he chooses to have a relationship with his father he surely can! when he is old enough to understand of course. which when you tell a preteen something like this do they ever understand until they find out on their own? my real dad was like that but HE left ME and came back around when i was in jr high and my mom tried to tell me but i just found out on my own. and god i hate him more now than when i did when i didn't know him at all.

It's hard to raise a child now a days and you and your child don't need the extra stress :) Good Luck. only you know best though. these are just opinions :)

I think you answered you own question. Your son will not remember him, he is too young. He is not a healthy candidate to be a father so you need to set you and your son up in a good life that does not revolve around staying close to this Dad.

Let it go, 5 hours is nothing....you need to do what is best for you, this guy has not given you any reason to accommodate him.

Why 5 hours away? Why not just one or two towns away? It will get you out of the drama but still keep the grandparents in his life.