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Should I have gone in this awkward situation?
I am 25, married, and living on my own with my husband.
My parents have been having horrible problems in their relationship. It has been so awkward during the holidays see my dad treat her badly and my mom shut down. My mom isn't perfect, but I have felt a lot of anger towards my dad for acting like a 3 year old not getting his way.
Long story short, my mom and dad are heading back here where I live after a road trip. I've already seen both of them already during Christmas. The initial plan was for my mom to drop my dad off at the airport and she and I would have lunch and spend today and tomorrow together. She texts me at 9:00 this morning and says they are making good time, would I want to go with them to take my dad to the airport?
I initially used the excuse that my husband was sick and came home from work and that I wanted to be with him until he woke up in case he needed me. That was part of the reason, but most of the reason was that I didn't want another awkward 2 hours with my parents together. I was pissed at my dad for throwing a hissy fit at a restaurant the day after Christmas, throwing a tray down and giving my mom a horrible look when she was just trying to help.
I don't want to see him right now, and I especially don't want to see them together because they don't love each other. I'm hoping they get a divorce, but until then, or until something works out, I'm not sure how I should react when they say they want to see me.
Should I have sucked it up and gone? Part of me says yes because my dad still loves me. But most of me says no because he's a two-faced asshole and I don't want to be around him.
My mom holds him back. She stopped holding them back because he was so fed up with it, and now they are wallowing in credit card debt, stuck in a house they can't afford, and he's spending his money on hookers behind her back. He told me this face to face. I still don't know if my mom knows.
My dad has cheated on her in the past, and imo they should have split up at that time. But my mom forgave him and they stayed together for another 15 years. My dad also sexually abused me when I was young. So I guess it is hard not to take sides with my mom. Even if she can be annoying, she's not a bad person.
2 Answers
- neveragainLv 51 decade agoFavorite Answer
Whatever did your Mom do to deserve to be treated so shabbily? If they're not happy with each other, fine, they should get a divorce. After they have made that decision then should act like two business people dividing a company, not two three year olds fighting over a toy box. Be there for both, but tell both you CAN'T take sides in this. Your Dad has anger issues and need counseling.
- 1 decade ago
Always be honest with yourself more so than others why lie? If you don't want too see your Dad then don't see him but also tell him your reasons you never know he might change his behaviour good luck