which of these scenarios to get Pujols is the funniest, most likely?

Pitt

1)Philadelphia: The Phillies will simply offer Pujols the major league minimum but with the incentive of not having to bat against Roy Halladay, Cliff Lee, Roy Oswalt and Cole Hamels. ROFL

2)Texas: The Rangers are willing to offer Alex Rodriguez's old contract to Pujols, by which they mean the $25 million they still owe A-Rod from the contract to which former owner Tom Hicks signed Rodriguez in 2000. They also are willing to give him Michael Young's locker, plus Young's jersey and all of Young's at-bats, all of which "we're sure Michael will be totally cool with."

3)Toronto: The Blue Jays will offer Pujols a back-loaded 10-year, $400 million contract. Later, they will trade him to the Angels when he gets old.

EDIT:

Tampa's is better than Toronto

I like the Tampa one. The Detroit one is good to.

More likely: The Rockies.