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What does your kid owe you?
I don't think my kid owes me a thing in the world. I wanted them, they didn't ask to be here. I have aspirations for them but, they don’t owe it to me to live up to what I planned for them. My retirement plan does not include being a burden upon my children.
I think any parent-child debt is strictly one sided, parent to child. What does your kid owe you?
I agree with a lot of you that I want my kid to want to make me proud but, I draw the line at it being a debt.
Melissa G, you seem very sweet but, I disagree. I knew when I had a kid I’d be on the hook for feeding, sheltering, and protecting them. That I didn't take the option of abandoning them (I’m a Dad by the way) doesn't really indebt them to me does it?
16 Answers
- ?Lv 41 decade agoFavorite Answer
My kids don't owe me much- I wanted them, I brought them into this world, like you said, they didn't ask to be here. They do owe me respect. Everything I do is for them and one day they'll realize that. I do hope that they want to make me proud and I hope that they know the best way to do that is to make the best out of this life and to be happy. That's my biggest hope for them. As long they're happy, secure, contributing adults, I feel like I've done my job. Obviously they don't actually owe it to me to do that, but I always felt that after all my parents did for me, that I owed it to them to be a contributing successful adult and to be a happy person.
The last thing in the world that I'd ever want to be is a burden (financially, emotionally and or physically) to them. If it came down between my children taking care of me or me going to the nursing home, I'd take the nursing home. I watched my mom take care of her dying father, and not only was it financially and physically exhausting, I couldn't imagine watching your parent die. There was also a lot of resentment from my mother to her father (she didn't ever say anything of course) for having to take care of him. Rationally she knew that it wasn't his fault- but after 2 years of doing it, resentment is only natural. I also wouldn't want to put my children in the horrifying and uncomfortable position to take care of me if and when I become incontinent, have Alzheimer's, need somebody to bathe me and feed me... that just isn't fair to them.
- IsaiahLv 51 decade ago
I think that they owe me a certain level of respect, aside from that I agree with you. The last thing I'd ever want is to be a burden in anyway. That's part of the reason I'm taking the steps now to be completely self sufficient (financially and physically) in my old age.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
I agree that children did not ask to be here and therefore in that context they should not have to live up to your aspirations and have you as a burden on them.
However from another point of view, they owe you alot of thanks for everything you did for them. The comfort and safety you provided when you brought them into the world, the sacrifices you made for them and the care you gave them over the years. If you wanted to you could have been one of these mothers who leaves her kids on their own and goes off and does her own thing, thinking about herself, but you weren't therefore I think it's only right that children repay you by looking after you in old age.
Also, how many children, if you asked them would actually say they 'wish they hadn't been born?'
- Toke LoverLv 71 decade ago
At the moment? About $16...I lent it to him.
Seriously? Yes, my kid owes me the following:
Respect
Adherence to the house rules
His chores, homework
That's about it, and the $16...he's 11 if that helps anything.
:)
- Anonymous5 years ago
Your rugrat owes you a back hander.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
They didn't ask to be born, but they did ask me to take them to the park, make a birthday gift for that birthday party, order pizza and buy that really big wooden swingset out back. It would be nice of them to keep their toys off my living room floor and treat me respectfully.
- 1 decade ago
I feel I "owe" my parents nothing...but to make them proud..which I do.
I am an intelligent and conscientious student and I love them more than anything.
They brought me on Earth to glorify God.
20 year old, college girl
- Anonymous1 decade ago
They don't owe me anything. I am, however, cursing them each with 3 girls of their own when they grow up!