Can my daughter play Piano && Violin ? ?

Oh, please let her!

I am fifteen years old, and I am pretty ashamed of my generation. I don't like that we paint our faces. I don't like that we burn our hair. I don't like that the average conversation at lunch is either about Glee, soccer, how cute he is, or what she said to her. I'm sick of the superficiality of it all. I really, really hate what's become of today's teenagers. What gets on my nerves the most, though, is the trashy music I hear on the radio. The same melodies, the same chord progressions, and just... disgusting lyrics. Everyone owns a pair of white ear buds, and they're all blasting this perverted, overly sexual music into their ears at ten times the healthy volume, and to what avail? I am so sick of it. I don't know what to do about it, which is why I am always so excited when I meet or hear about a teenager interested in the little bit of culture the world has to offer. Language, museums, classic novels. And especially classical music.

Please. If you can pay for lessons, and if she wants them, give them to her. I love the piano so much. I've learned more than I ever thought I would, and it's become such an integral part of my life that I don't know what I would be doing without it. I've made so many friends because of my love for classical music, and so many doors have been opened for me, so many opportunities, and I just want everyone my age to have this and know that they can have it to if they just open themselves to it. She is open to it. It can only benefit her.

Of course, it is normal to want to go outside and hang out with friends. But it is also normal to want the exact opposite. I'm not a very social person, but I do have many friends that I love, and I am completely happy, and I'm pretty sure that my life is much more productive than other people my age. My friends are amazing people. They participate in piano competitions and volunteer and make excellent grades and smile. My best friend is a competitive figure skater. My other best friend volunteers at nursing homes and hospitals every single day. Another good friend of mine is in Russia right now on scholarship, studying the language and the culture. These people are just like me. They aren't interested in doing trivial, expensive things - they want to broaden their horizons. My point in telling you all of this is that it is not unhealthy for your daughter to not want to hang out with friends, because she can still have friends and still have a satisfying life, even if she doesn't want to do what the rest of her generation is doing.

Please please please let her take lessons. You will be doing her the favor of her life.

To re-iterate what everyone else here has said, 19 months is too young to start private music lessons. If you really want to get her involved in music, try an early childhood music class like Kindermusik or Music for Young Children. Some music schools also have their own programs for children that young. These are group classes (often with the parents involved in the class), where they learn basic music skills (ear training, rhythm, etc...). She won't be learning to play the violin, but she will be developing skills that will help her when she does start to learn to play an instrument. If you do decide to go this route, make sure that the instructor has training in early childhood music education (!!!!) Check it out, because some music schools will just throw a really young and inexperienced teacher who doesn't know what they're getting themselves in to, into a room with a group of three year olds, and call it an ECM class. My personal opinion of these classes though, is that they're really a waste of time and money before the age of three, even if they DO sometimes offer group lessons for children starting at the age of 6 months. Please wait until she's AT LEAST three to enroll her in one of these. Once she's 5, she can start private lessons. 30 minutes once a week will be lots, you might even consider 20 minute lessons to start, if it's not enough time the teacher will let you know after a couple of weeks and you can always increase the lesson length. Bear in mind that when she starts to play the violin, she will be developing callouses on the hand that presses down the strings on the neck of the violin. Could hurt her little fingers. Might not be a bad idea to put her in a couple of years of piano lessons first to develop some finger strength, but that's just my opinion. As far as what to do in the meantime, you're already doing a really good job with that by just exposing her to music. Listen to different instruments and styles too, though, not just classical violin music.

I know lots of musicians who play both piano and violin, or piano and viola, or piano and trombone, or piano and flute and so on. There is absolutely no reason she can't do both if she has the time. Most people who are really into music learn more than one instrument.

Personally I was happy when my daughter entered the early teen years with no desire to hang out at the mall with a bunch of ditzy girls who had nothing in their brains other than clothes and the boys they were chasing. I know when I was that age I preferred to spend time in a music group with people who shared my interests. Not everyone wants to be a social butterfly.

Well, if she doesn't have much of a busy schedule and doesn't do much, let her! She has the time, and she wants to play both! Some people (like me) like staying inside, doing homework (yes, I have homework over the summer assigned by my mom), playing cello and piano, and read. I would let her if I were you. And even if you do want her to hang out with her friends, she can play the piano and violin and schedule times when she's not practicing to go out with her friends. It doesn't seem as if she's that busy, and it's not like she's going to spend the whole day practicing the two instruments.

When I was her age, I was playing both flute and piano. I was in advanced piano levels, taking lessons, and did flute in band. I really wished I took lessons in flute or something else at the time because because I wouldn't have to be trying to get proficient later in life. Now I am very advanced in piano but am struggling to find time to take both lessons in oboe and keyboard.

That being said, I have a full-time job now (well, grad student), and at some point I was managing both oboe and keyboard lessons and played in one orchestra and one band. Yes, it took lots of time, but I am so glad I stuck with it. If your daughter likes, it then let her. Kids have all the time in the world to hang out with friends and do other useless things. If she has the opportunity to do violin and piano, and if she enjoys it, then let her.

And at some point in my life, I want to learn violin. 3 instruments is going to be pushing it when you want to play at my level (advanced and beyond), but for a kid just starting to get involved in music, then let her do it. It's not like she's going to spend hours practicing, if she's just starting anyway....an hour or two total. If I didn't take initiative to pick up an instrument and start from scratch (as an adult), then I wouldn't have met all the friends and musicians or be given so many cool opportunities. Especially with violin, once she gets to a good playing level, she can go and play in groups with kids her age. Then she can socialize and play music at the same time! Even outside, if she needs some sunlight!

hey, I'm only 3 years older than your daughter, so I think I can relate.

Maybe she just doesn't want to be around people. There, I said it. Not everybody is an extrovert, despite the efforts of modern society to make us all want to be super-peppy and crazy social 24/7. Being a high school girl, I'm expected to play 400 sports, have a number of friends to match, and talk my face off to everyone I see. The reality is in stark contrast: I sit in my room and I play the cello. When my fingertips start to hurt (or, in the present case, when my wrists start aching), I read, drink tea, listen to music, answer questions on Yahoo! Answers, and am generally unsocial. Contrary to popular belief, I am a very happy, healthy person.

Perhaps your daughter is the same way. If she's anything at all like me, then hanging out with her friends probably makes her exhausted and depressed. Just let her do what she wants to do; it takes a very special person to love music enough to practise for fun. Just keep your ears open. If she ever says that her fingers, back, shoulders, wrists, elbows, etc. hurt, ask her what kind of hurt it is. If it sounds like it's more serious than the temporary soreness that comes from practising too much, you might consider taking her to a doctor. People who practise as much as she does are at a higher risk for instrument-related injuries. I started playing the cello at the age of 12, and I practised so much that I actually altered the way my bones grew; as a result, my ulna is too long and my radius is too short, causing me considerable pain when I try to practise for extended amounts of time or do anything else that involves my wrists (such as kneading bread or riding a bike). Basically, what I'm saying is that you should NOT try to stop her from doing what she loves, but if her practise starts to hurt her, it would be in her best interest to see a doctor immediately.

extremely common to play both!

and remember, in lessons you learn general music stuff as well as things specific to the instrument. so a second instrument tends to come faster and enhance your understanding of the original instrument.

also, music is quite social. so get her into a youth symphony or chamber music program if you want to make sure she socializes enough.

as for going outside... if her non practice time is being spent on her ipod anyway... thats not a problem with the instrument.. thats just her not liking to go outside... its a different battle.

i'd say about half my students play at least one more instrument, and more than half are also on sports teams. uh... for musicians... soccer is a better choice than volleyball or basketball... too many jammed fingers in those ones!!

and if she decides to major in music in college, she will have a "piano proficiency" requirement anyway... so having a head start on that is an advantage.

But if music is what she loves to do (and this does sound like the case) then of course it should be encouraged, right?:) i think you're worried about the social element of growing up, but i'll tell you, if she wanted to be outside playing, she would be, and you'd be forcing her to come inside to practise. if you're worried about her making friends, see if you can find a community youth orchestra or choir she can join. 3 instruments to study at once sounds like a lot to me too, and i don't know if i personally would bite off quite that much, but then again i have come across others for whom it would be no big deal to tackle at all. if you think that she's capable of handling it, give it a shot, but maybe start with a trial period - sign up for a term of lessons instead of an entire year, and then reassess at the end of the term, and if she's finding it to be too much, then maybe drop an instrument after that.

For goodness sakes man. Mozart was doing more than that when he was 6! If she want's to do it: let her.