Do you like the poem I wrote?

I did some slight editing (grammar fixing) so it is considered more of poetry (:

Looking outside, it's so dark and cloudy

That's how it feels all around me,

Trying to run from the pain

But I always end up in the pouring rain,

The past is the past, well it's yesterday

So fresh in my mind, it's a test - and I'm failing

This **** is just not availing

Now look outside, you can see that it's hailing

I've lost everything, so now I'm mailing

The heart, it just came out of my chest

Straight to your door, thee exact address

Do you want me now that I'm dead and gone

And our only memories are cold and done

Well, now I'm trailing, six feet under

my veins are cold but my heart is like thunder

For the rest of your life, you will hear

the beat of my heart that you helped to shear

It will cry all my tears

You should have seen my heart shatter

All over the walls

Was everything spattered

I saw them because my sight it lingered

and I traced the lines with my little finger

I hope it says "I love you" which is what I tried to write

But my memory is so foggy, now that I have died

I think it's really good btw!(:

Nah. I took too many Literature classes to take new age teen poetry seriously.

Excellent. Kinda depressing though.

Bit gory

Very good. I'm impressed. Keep up the good work.

cool poem bro

You need prompt professional help.

its great, better as poem

NO