why cant my husband understand things agter 30 years of marriage?

I truly understand how you feel . I feel like thatmost of the time too. Most time men just doesn't understand how to comfort some or their wife. My husband is the same lime yours too. No matter who's at fault it alwYs seems lime I am the one who end up comforting him first.

We own our own small business. Lately it's very very slow and my husband is always worry or stressed out. When he does stress out, I pretend not to be stress out and I comfort him and remind him that things will get better in time. I assure him and he seems to be a little stressfree. But when I am stress out he doesnt do the same for me. I am alone when I stress out.

Maybe he is like mine too where he doesn't know how to comfort you or doesn't know where to start. Be patient and be the first to comfort him okay. Hopefully 2012 will bring all of us a brighter and more financially stable year. Just stay strong and happy new year to you and your family.

so what's your situation? in case you prefer lots undesirable on your husband why have you ever stayed with him for greater effective than 30 years. whether it is so undesirable and the babies are grown why do not you break up. you would be satisfied you nevertheless have your husband. After 30 satisfied years my darling died of lung maximum cancers. i might relive our worst day if it meant he might desire to come returned to me. whilst some thing occurs on your husband you would be the 1st actual to cry and you will bear in mind and be apologetic approximately those words. there is not any arguement or disaggreement we ever had that's larger than the loneliness and heartache of lacking him now.. you have your husband alive and there to harass you. Get councelling and attach the subjects or get a lawyer and break up existence is in simple terms too short to spend it unhappy, it extremely is in simple terms too short to waste time on petty nonsense once you have a stable element.

I'm guessing because for the last thirty years most of the time he sought emotional support you had a headache so you have conditioned him to regard you as a source of negative emotion which leads him to be apathetic towards you instead of affectionate.

William, that's because he is a man, and supposedly a bread winner, so it might be much harder on him. His self-worth as a man, as he perceives it now, is very low.

Besides, he can't just babysit neighbors' children, be an hourly nanny of disabled or elderly there, or do light cleaning in their houses, which you can always do. Could it be that he needs to be held too? Depression is kinda anti-job medicine, right?

In any case, don't give up, don't cry when he can see or hear you, and by all means go out for a stress-relieving walks: it costs no money and you can make it very romantic. Be strong and it will make him stronger. Happy New Year, as YOU can make it so.

Like yourself, he is overwhelmed with all the shock of all the emptiness in your guys' life right now.

He's not being selfish. It's just that things to do with closeness and love is the last thing on a man's mind when his career has suddenly ended.

Be strong at this time. Times are tough and you could lose a lot more if you over-react.

Quite possibly, he's pretty sick you sitting around crying. You're both out of work, and here you are making it worse. Here's a test. Can you pass it? Stop crying. Smile. Tell him you know it can only get better and that if it doesn't, it can't get so bad that you don't have each other. You'll be amazed.

Some days, i get really sick of my husbands constant attention - i mean - non stop sms messages, like 20 per day, constant approaching me, hugging me, kissing me every 20 minutes.

But every now and again , I guess I realise that Im lucky, Id rather be me then you .

After 30 years, i dont think he will change.

Sorry.. got no more advice...

Why don't you understand that he is likely depressed and does not know how to handle the feelings, except to consider suicide, which men are doing in rates 8X higher than women right now.

My dear friend,do not cry.It will lead you nowhere.Why you do not try for a job?

I am sorry your having a tough time. I hpe next year will be a better year for you both. I know its tough. He is probably hurting now too. Why not go over to him and give him a hug. im on yahoo