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My parents found out I had "sex" with my EX-boyfriend and I'm 14 years old. HELP! I don't know what to do...?

I'm 14 and he is 16. We have been together for 8 months but he broke up with me like 4 days ago. I thought it would be a just a little brake. About 4 months ago I sneaked out to meet up with him. We just wanted to hang out and be together since my mom is kind of strict. We met up and talked for awhile but them he took me to his bedroom. I didn't think anything that bad was going to happen. I mean I knew things would happen but not that bad like having sex. We started making out and I was on top of him. He took of my shirt but I didn't do anything because I thought we were just messing around. But then it got a little crazy. He started taking of my bra and then that's when I stopped him. He said "lets just try it, we both love each other" then I said "I'm only 14 and you're 16, I'm not ready." He always makes me feel guilty so he said " Are you saying you're not ready for us? age doesn't matter, we both love each other, so lets just do it." (He has been trying to get me to have sex with him since we ever got together but I kept saying no and we would always get into little fights about that). I finally just went with the flow. Whatever was going to happen would happen. It got even crazier and I kept stopping threw the whole thing because I was scared and I wasn't ready. A little part of me said yes but a big part of me said NO. For some reason I went with the little yes part of me. We "did it" but really we kind of didn't. I didn't feel anything and I know for a fact that it didn't go in. and it only lasted 2 minutes. He asked me afterwards if it went in and I said yes because I knew if I said no then he would want to do it a second time to make sure we went all he way. But I lied to him because I didn't want to do it again and I was scared.

After that things were kinda normal but awkward. We didn't do it a second time. I told some of my friends but not to brag. I just had to vent because that always makes me feel better. I was scared because I didn't want my boyfriend to brag. 4 months have passed and that's when it all started going down hill. Me and my boyfriend were having problems communicating. I though he was avoiding me so we were taking a little brake. ( this was about 4 days ago). I was depressed because I thought this brake would never end. I didn't talk to anyone and I cried everyday when I got home.

Yesterday I was babysitting my baby sister and my mom was out. When she got home, her and her friend went into my room, closed my door, and sat down. My mom looked like she was crying. She told me she brought her friend with her to calm down. I knew she found out something bad and I was hoping it wasn't sex with my ex. She told me she found out that I had sex with my ex-boyfriend from three of my "friends" I asked her who but she wont tell me. That's when I went insane. I thought my life was over and sill do. She was yelling and calling me a whore. I locked myself in the bathroom with pills. I didn't want to live but my step dad broke down the door and took them. I want to run away.

Then my mom told me that she called his parents too and told them everything. I love his family. They are very christian though and want the best for there son. They even brought him to talk to a priest after finding out. I can't imagine what's going on. His sweet mom is probably broken inside and she is ALWAYS happy. They sat him down to talk. I wish my mom would of done that instead of just yell. He told them we did but it didn't really count and it was only like 2 minutes. Then he told them we did it about a month ago?!!?!? um no it was 4 months ago! and then what really ticked me off was he told them that I wanted it and pressured him! WTF. I did not want it and he pressured me. All I want to do is confront him and cuss him out. His parents probably hate me and think I'm a whore. They are probably blaming it all on me. Actually I'm being blamed threw out the whole thing. I keep telling my mom that what he is saying is not all true but she doesn't believe me or trust me. I don't want to go o school on Monday. I want to to move. I want to go to a different school. I want to find out the "friends" who told my mom. And I don't want to see him because I just can't see someone who has lied to get me more in trouble and to make himself sound like more of the victim and someone who has broken my heart into pieces. I'm too embarrassed to see his family. I just can't. and there is only 4 weeks left of school but I just can't go back. I don't know what to do. Please help me. I'm so lost and scared:(

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  • ?
    Lv 4
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Alright. Firstly, let me say your ex is a scumbag. ANd in a religious perspective, is NOT a true christian. So if your religious like me, dont take justice into your own hands. God will take care of that. And if your an atheist, than dont turn to violence for gratification. It will make it worse. Dont tell him off either. SO this guy didnt care about you. He was using you. I understand completely as a teenager how hard it is to resist peer pressure. So i understand your situation. Dont beat yourself down. Everybody does stupid things and makes mistakes. Its apart of life. So this is what you should do. Before you try to appeal to your friends or your bf and his family, try to regain your familie's trust. Dont try to argue with them and say "i didnt do it". because half the time, that NEVER works. JUst admit to them you were wrong, you are sorry, and you will never do it again. AT this point, they will probably say something back, and then sit down and tell them what really happened. The whole story, just as you told us, with every detail. Then after you regain your parents trust, you can ask your mom to call your ex's parents and explain what happened so they dont hate you.

    This guy was a bad man. And he is a liar. Dont go near him. Be careful with your friends as well. Dont tell them everything. If you want to tell someone maybe write it in a diary, and people here on yahoo answers would love to listen and reply. be careful who you trust. Please dont kill yourself. I know you feel really upset inside, but killing yourself will only make your famlily more miserable, and you may tick off your classmates. Plus in a religious sense, i learned that you will not be in heaven if you do. No matter how empty you feel, your not alone. I dont mean to sound like a religious freak here, but maybe this will help. Just pray. Because God can fix anything. I have witnessed his power. I have seen it. Numerous miracles. SO whenever you feel alone, and want to kill yourself, dont do it. You can ask god if he will do it, but dont take a knife and slit your throat. I know you probably dont think prayer will help THAT much, but trust me.

    Hope i helped

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    You may be wondering how to get your ex back when he has a another if you're still in love. Go to see more: https://tr.im/k87GU

    Is there anything more difficult than seeing the man you still love with another woman? It's emotional torture and for many women it's something they have to deal with on a daily basis. Wanting him back after the break up is one thing but when he's already moved on and is dating someone new, it becomes a much more challenging situation. There is a right way and a wrong way to handle a situation like this if your goal is to get back together with him. Understanding the steps you need to take and what you have to avoid at all costs, will allow you to have the best chance of becoming the woman he loves again.

  • 8 years ago

    Your ex is such a hypocrite. A real Christian forbids sex before marriage. You're so depressed I know that feel. Don't kill yourself with pills because you still have a long way out there. What happened just happened and all you have to do is repent (if you're a Christian) deep in your heart and if your parents still hate you, leave them alone. At least you repent, but still there is a consequence for sinning. Don't let that guy see you anymore and if you wanna figure out your "friends" try remember back who you told to and did they know your parents? did they have your mom's contact? Hope this really helps you. (NB: your parents actually loves you, do you notice that you're still living in their home? not kicked out? sorry if you're actually kicked out because in our country, strict parents will kick their children out from their house if they done that.)

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    You have 3 problems. Your boyfriend pushed the rape line. Your bf lied to save his skin and get you into more trouble. And your parents are sexually abusive to you (using names that ridicule women for enjoying sex like every other female animal on the planet). Your answer to the first is to tell the truth. Even though it's too late to press charges successfully, writing letters or telling both sets of parents what happened will help in the long run. Telling the school that your virgin bf enjoyed your thighs more than other areas will reverse the damage at school, as well. The traditional revenge, spreading word of his gross make out skills, is also appropriate. You might tell your parents that you'd like to have an adult conversation about sex that doesn't involve yelling, but they sound very temperamental. All you can do with parents like that is keep your head down and your social life up until you can move out, it gets better.

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  • 7 years ago

    I know this was asked a few years ago but just incase someone else is reading this even if it is just one person I hope I can help. The same thing happened to me yesterday. He pressured me, I told him it was in even tho I didnt feel it, and it was awkwardly over. He never loved me, even though when we met a year ago it was so lovey. I wanted to keep him cause I liked the way things used to be, but it wasn't the same as in the beginning. He only stuck around for one thing. My mom found out like 10 min later cause my sister and friend ratted me out and she ended up going to his house and telling his mom. She was pissed. I don't know what he thinks of me but I know it's not a good thing. It makes me extremely hurt but I just want whoever is reading this to know, ur not alone.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Awww! I feel so bad for you! I'm 14 too! My ex boyfriend always used to try to get me to have sex with him but I always said no. Your friends sound like bitches. But I have no right to judge... I'm sure if they are true friends they wouldn't have told anyone.You should talk to your boyfriend and explain to your parents. And don't run away. That will get you into a worse situation. Dont do anything rash. Try to keep your cool. Everything will work out in the end. Keep your ground. And don't let anyone make you feel bad about yourself. Keep your head up. It will blow over soon. Good luck dear!!

    Source(s): Sadly, the same thing happened to my friend.
  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I agree with Paul, and I have gone through the same thing you are, keep your head up and you probably shouldn't date, till your older. I'm 17 and I am waiting to date again after i graduate High school. All the boys want is sex from you then you're out of their lives.

    Source(s): My Ex. BF lied to everyone and said we had sex, when we didn't.
  • 6 years ago

    This Site Might Help You.

    RE:

    My parents found out I had "sex" with my EX-boyfriend and I'm 14 years old. HELP! I don't know what to do...?

    I'm 14 and he is 16. We have been together for 8 months but he broke up with me like 4 days ago. I thought it would be a just a little brake. About 4 months ago I sneaked out to meet up with him. We just wanted to hang out and be together since my mom is kind of strict. We met up and talked for...

    Source(s): parents quot sex quot boyfriend 39 14 years don 39 do: https://tr.im/iLsRF
  • 6 years ago

    I can't help you in that aspect, though, as the world is VERY UNFAIR, try the app 'Whisper'. It's an anonymous confession service. No one will have a clue who you are!

  • 9 years ago

    First off 14 is to young for sex. But you knew that already. Dating is fine but not with horny boys (Thats same as a 16 yr old). It's over and done with so you have a lesson to learn. You need to look at the root in the dirt not the pretty flower on top. So you had sex, he got what he wanted so he broke up, your parents found out and are upset, his parents found out and they are upset, he never cared about you or he would of not lied and said you were the pusher. And to top it off you want to die.

    Now lets look at what would happen if you just would of said no. He would of got upset and broke up with you. Your parents would not be upset, in fact, if they found out they would have been proud of you and the same would for his parents. You would not want to die but realize that you are a good person and be excited for the next relationship to see if that would be the right 1.

    You need to go to your parents and tell them you have something to say without them interrupting and tell them what really happened. If that is hard then print out your question and give it to them. I see a lot of good in you. You need to go with that what feels right and stick to it.

    Source(s): Experience as a 16 yr old and a father at 53 yrs old
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