My boyfriend playing poker?

I think you are right to worry. I also think.......no strike that......I also KNOW that at 18 he is MUCH more likely to become addicted than is someone 21 years or older.

What many people your age, (and his), don't understand is that the human brain is still developing until you are about 21 years old. This makes young folks like yourselves much more susceptible to addiction of any sort.

I'm not saying he's addicted. I really don't know. I'm just telling you that you are wise to worry and to question him.

A "free-roll" is a poker tournament that you can enter for free, and if you win the tournament, you win a small real-money prize. It is people's hopes that they can win these free-rolls, then build that real money into a real bankroll. It's mostly delusion. A world-famous poker player actually did this, and turned nothing into 10,000 American dollars. It took him a year, and he is one of the best poker players on the planet. Although I don't see any harm in playing these for your boyfriend, it's just not likely that anything will ever come of them.

Bottom line, if he's telling you that he's only playing poker for the entertainment value, (it would have to be that since he said he's not playing for the money), then he should still keep track carefully of what he spends. If at the end of the month he is spending more money on poker than he would for any other form of entertainment, then it's time for him to be honest with himself and with you.

***EDIT***

jeremyj333 told you that 95% of folks are NOT problem gamblers. That's probably true about the general population. How about the percentage of people who come here to ask about potential gambling problems? I'd put that at about 95% who ask about a gambling problem have good reason to ask!

Add some perspective to the situation.

Hi. Your concerns are quite common and are legitimate. For many people, poker is a healthy hobby. For some, it's a degenerative one. Since you're basically an outsider to the poker world, it's hard for you to tell which of those describes your boyfriend's playing.

From the little bit you've told us, it sounds good. 3-4 times a month sounds like a casual hobby, not an addictive obsession depleting his bank account. Online freerolls are tournaments that cost absolutely nothing to play. 18 is a perfectly fine age to play poker. Of course not all 18-year-olds are equally mature, responsible and disciplined, but if you're dating him in the first place then you probably wouldn't describe him as immature and irresponsible.

Poker is indeed gambling but at the same time it is a game of skill (I won't go into the details of that here, but I assure you it's not a paradox). So like other hobbies of skill, it's one that he has the potential to improve at. Maybe now it costs him some money each month to enjoy the hobby, but maybe in the future it won't cost anything or better yet, maybe he'll be profiting from it.

As long as he's not playing in stakes he can't afford, he's in good shape. It's something you can monitor a little bit. But keep in mind, there's no reason to panic when he has a losing session, because short-term results say nothing about how he's doing long-term, and losing sessions are inevitable. And since he's only playing 4 times a month, it's not unlikely for him to have a losing month or a losing 2 months.

If the long-term losses are significant amounts, then he should be playing lower stakes (and if he can't tolerate lower stakes, then he shouldn't be playing at all).

I hope that helps.

You ARE a control freak. You want him to change to fit YOUR ideals.

Is he risking the rent money? Are bills in danger of not getting paid because of his poker playing? Probably not. And its completely unfair to call this a slippery slope. Just because you've known other people who can't control themsevles isn't the fault of 'poker'. It was thier lack of self control. Drugs, tobacco, alcohol aren't to blame for addicts being addicts. Its the PEOPLE who use them. So no, just because someone you know had a problem with gambling DOES NOT mean that its a slippery slope for your bf. And yes, when you bring it up its going to cause fights because so far, you don't have a good arguement against it.

playing 3-4 times a month?? sounds pretty recreational...

it seems to me that you fear this mainly because you dont understand it...why would you ask him to stop doing something that you have no idea as to whether it is or is not a problem?

that seems unfair to me...

freerolls are basically free tourneys with real prizes...

95% of Gamblers are not problem gamblers.