How should my parents be introduced and how should I be introduced at my sweet 16?

I have a bit more commentary, but Y!A cut it off without telling me the limit.

If you want any more on this, please email me through my profile; yours is closed.

---------------------------------------

"Missouri" is hardly a definition of social structure, although it gives me some ideas, as I was born there. Okay, so there is no such thing as "should", and you have no script whatsoever.

This format depends on the purpose of you throwing the party as a "sweet 16", instead of merely a birthday party. You already have something in mind, as you've assumed introductions and a father-daughter dance. It appears that you have *some* tradition in mind, or at least some feeling of scripted formality.

It also seems that you don't realize how much of this is running through your mind. I have a bit of trouble helping out, since you've told us so little. Will the guests be family, friends, a mixture? What is the general tenor of the crowd: family event, a gaggle of you and your friends, or likely boys as dance partners? Are you looking for dating prospects? Do you have a particular guy in mind? Is there an opening of presents? What sort of refreshments or meal is served?

Obviously, all of those are things you have to plan, or have someone else orchestrate. The facilities don't have to be posh; one of my classmates had a perfectly good 16 party in her basement with family pot-luck, a small list of close friends (and an appropriate number of guys), and a record player for the dance music.

So let's get *something* on paper as a starting point. Will the guest tend to be on time and stay until the end, or will they be wandering in and out throughout the event? This will affect the timing of the introductions. So ...

(1) As the guests arrive, your parents and other helpers greet them, introduce them to the refreshment table and each other, and let them mingle. Perhaps there is a pre-party mixer game to keep them occupied.

(2a) Perhaps half an hour in, when there are "enough" people there, some close friend or relative introduces your parents, thanking them for throwing the party, for having you, etc.

(2b) Someone (probably the same person) introduces you, the newly-minted young lady, perhaps making lightly humorous comments about your imminent driver's license and other social aspects of your new age. You now appear in the doorway, all "dolled up", everyone gets to ooh and aah, and you do the "Princess Diaries" nobility thing as best you can while the guys pick their tongues off the floor and undo the tangles.

(3) You mingle for a few minutes, perhaps participate or orchestrate the ending of the mixer game, and make *sure* that you keep moving until you've made nice with each cluster in the room. You're the reason for the party, and it's only proper for you to make yourself available to all, if only for a minute each.

FYI, if you're looking for birthday kisses without particular offense, you might consider starting this round with some group that includes a male cousin or two. This can break some of the ice for any guys who are wondering whether it's okay.

(4) If there's a meal or "significant" hors d'oeuvres, that's probably next. Again, remember that you're the guest of honor as well as effective junior hostess: mingle, even if it's only to ask after the quality of Uncle Dan's coffee.

(5) Once the food is generally out of the way, you can start the dancing. In most of our European traditions, the "showcase" dance is the first one. You and Dad should have chosen a song and a dance. The Emcee can let everyone know that this will be the traditional father-daughter dance, and ask everyone to hold back for a minute. Figure out ahead of time whether you want the whole dance to yourselves, or whether you want others to join in after one verse.

Also, will your dad dance with you the entire song, or will he trade you off for your mom? Either way, it's a good idea to have some plan for your next dance partner, whether it's your boyfriend, your crush, or one of those male cousins. Having your second partner already planned has two advantages:

(a) you don't have the awkward possibility of being without a partner for ten seconds, while every free guy in the room waffles over whether he should be the first to ask;

(b) you don't have the awkward possibility of getting trampled in the rush and having to make up your mind on the spot. You sweetly apologize that your next dance is already spoken for, and you'll get to each of them in turn.

We use sweets as treats. Sweet is something that you earn and that grandma's and auntie's offer you not things that you even think about asking mommy for. My children are satisfied that candy and sweets are for occasions handiest and my daughter without a doubt notion a bit boy at school used to be mendacity when he advised her that he bought cookies and candy everyday. There's no cause to be to strict about it, simply make it a topic of reality thing. "you need candy you have got to earn it or go see grandma for the reason that i do not hand that stuff out."