separation of husband after 32 years?

I don't know if you've told them the reasons you've done this or if you've kept it to yourself. There is this notion that you keep things from the kids, because its none of their business, but I think you tell them the truth. Tell them why you did this and they may not be angry with you. When I divorced, I told my kids that their dad had a long term affair and that I was very angry about it, but that he had done nothing bad to them, and they were not to take on my issue. They didn't and they had a good relationship with him at that time. They don't remember how he used to treat me, because they were young, but good news for you; your kids are old enough to remember how he treated you. Explain to them why you did what you did (presumably, you didn't do this to get even with him and you did it for a valid reason). My kids have always understood my reasons. My friend did not tell her kids, that he was abusive and tried to hide it from them. Her ex. speaks badly about her and the kids believe him. This is why you tell the truth! She had to call the police on him as well!

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/Hh72O

You don't say IF he posed a threat of any kind, as to WHY he needs to distance himself from you in the divorce...I suspect your 3 grown kids don't "hate" you but have OTHER "axes" to grind that aren't necessarily ABOUT you and he, hm? Or, if they are? The kids see the "two sides" or maybe just his, to this story, hm?

You need to pick up the pieces of your life. Hopefully continue to work at something construction and that brings income until you can receive enough money through retirement/his to live on...And manage on your own and probably most important of all? BE an adult; LIVE with your mistakes; ASK forgiveness if need be and just move on with your life and take what "heat" you can (and may deserve) but DON'T take what you don't deserve.

Grace

The kids will come around once things get sorted and settled. It's difficult for them as well. Give them some time. You can always ring them all up and have them over for dinner and talk about their feelings. Be safe, and best wishes.