Would you care to comment on or critique this poem?

Question

"Adagio"

Are you made of gold, my dear,
for sun gleams from your skin.
The constellations line your gaze,
such beauty could be sin.

Prayers of youth from flawless lips,
pomegranate kisses, ever present faith...
Little one, return, I see, (I failed you)
I see (I miss you)
I see.

Artist, poet, lover, dream,
definitions lost, perhaps discarded.
I press scarred hands to the glass that holds you,
my reflection, kept in chains.
You scream at me and I know, (forgive me)
I know (I'm sorry)
I know.

Please, re-emerge with lightning, flame,
make this heart once more full...
remind this world it's beautiful,
for I know it is cruel.

? · Accepted Answer

This is to me a poem about the poet's search for renewal, a vibrant muse that used to be at onne's beck and call, somehow become elusive. A longing for the innocence of a beginning poet, before all words written and all things learned. It is beautiful, even in sorrow.

Oh I almost forgot- great title.

brueggemann · Answer

I loved this. It makes me want for a peek. Like Shirley, I look ahead to the pleased blossum of daffodils and tulips adverse to iciness's from time to time dreary backdrop. and prefer you, I were considering putting my options into words. This become very pleased and contained a deeper message. a minimum of it really is how I received it. thanks for sharing.

Anonymous · Answer

Excellent construction.

Anonymous · Answer

Awww.  :)

Not trying to sound self adsorbed but I feel like that right now haha.

the cheese whisperer · Answer

Amazing and beautiful. A love poem, and it moved me.

? · Answer

That was so beautiful :). Wow. I love it. Seriously it took my breath away. I lovee how you described " constelations line your gaze, sich beauty could be sin"

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Would you care to comment on or critique this poem?

6 Answers