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Please help me with my English Essay?
Hi guys, I am actually learning English at school and I am witting an essay. Please revise it and tell me what I should change and how to make it better. Thanks a lot.
My mom has been living in Los Angeles, Ca for many years. Finally, On April of 2005, I could come to USA legally and came to my mom’s house. It was a huge charge for me because I haven’t been living with her for the last 17 years. Although, she used to visit us once a year when I was in Guatemala, our relationship wasn’t the best since we really know each other that well. Also, I only have step brothers and sisters, 4 kids are from one day, other 3 from a different dad and last bother is from another man.
Thanks
2 Answers
- Candy katLv 68 years agoFavorite Answer
"My mom has been living in Los Angeles, Ca for many years. Finally on April of 2005, I was able to come to the USA legally and came to my mom's house. It was a huge *change* for me because I haven't been with her for the last seventeen years. Although (you don't need the coma there) she used to visit us once a year when I was in Guatemala, our relationship wasn't the best because we *didn't* really know each other that well. Also, I only have step brothers and sisters. Four kids are from one dad, three are from a different dad, and the last brother is from another man"
Most of what you wrote was grammatically correct but I just revised some of it to make it sound more natural. You did really good :)
- kirganLv 45 years ago
I write officially whilst i write my essays, so sure and as i've an personal instructor in english she tells me to write down it officially so sure , i consider you need to write it officially!
