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Help! In law troubles!?
There are so many details in this situation, to many to list, so here is the gist of things: my husband and I had out first child not to long ago, and my husbands mother just won't stop meddling! I feel like everyday I get a call from my MIL, inquiring how things are - which is fine- but when I mention anything like "baby is a little cranky today" I get the 10th degree about how I am doing things wrong, I shouldn't do this or that. The last straw was when I mentioned I was celebrating Christmas with my parents, and my MIL went on a rage about how Christmas is a pagan holiday, I'm going to corrupt my child, yadda yadda yadda. (We do not share the same view on religion - she is a different religion than I am). My husband and I have already agreed on how we are raising our child, spiritually, discipline wise, and etc. but the MIL keeps coming between my husband and I and making him doubt our decision. My mom is not like this, what the heck should I do??
4 Answers
- StiobhanLv 68 years agoFavorite Answer
I could list suggested rebuttals to specifics comments, regarding christmas....but I don't see that as actually being the problem.
My first suggestion would be show your post to your husband.....let him see that this is upsetting you so much that you felt you had to ask strangers how to deal with her.
Then tell him it was suggested that he "man up" and stop leaving his wife to deal with his mother. Sorry, I know this sounds harsh....but men are often so conflict avoidant, they will let a situation escalate to almost atomic levels between their mothers and their wives....and it's not right.
Next time she starts to gives you the "10th degree".....tell her how much you appreciate her concern, and that your sure you will learn how to do the motherhood role the same way everyone else does....by trial and ERROR.
If she is pushing religion, and you have different views, thank her for her opinion, and inform her that you are not, nor are you raising your children within her beliefs....then refuse to discuss it any further.
Source(s): Just my opinion....which is of no more value than your own ;) - Anonymous5 years ago
Couple of issues here. First if your mother in law is a pot head, i'd never leave any of your kids alone with her where she could put them in a car! Your Stepfather is acting like an a$$! You need to talk to your husband and find out why he gets mad when you talk about moving. How about moving somewhere where its the same distance from both families. But I'd suggest finding a spot that is not walking or a short drive. Make it 20-30 minutes minimum, That way both families would have to make an effort.
- Anonymous8 years ago
Ignore her and get caller id so you don't have to answer her calls.
Christmas is not a pagan holiday, it was only set at the time of a pagan holiday because many people back then were pagans and it gave them an excuse to celebrate when their religion was outlawed. It is christian, but the Christians would have a giant pagan uprising if they took away all their holidays I think. Don't tell her what you are doing, it's your choice and she doesn't have to know.
- SanLv 68 years ago
Your husband needs to tell her to stop, if he will not do this tell him you will. She needs to be put in her place.
