How can I learn to love my child?

Question

My son is 8 years old and a holy terror. He's the most annoying person I've ever met. He's ADHD and when he's on his meds he's ok, but as soon as they wear off he's a little devil. I feel like a horrible mother because most days I wish I'd never had him, which is really sad because all I ever wanted was to me a mother. My other 2 children are well behaved, do great in school and try to get along with each other. My son goes out of his way to annoy everyone and is very defiant. I have tried positive reinforcement as well as punishment, but nothing works for this kid. I do love him, but I don't like him or enjoy his company at all. I don't think it's just a phase because this has been an issue most of his life. What can I do?

Update:

I know I'm a horrible mother for having these feeling without everyone telling me. Trust me, I pray every day for God to help me be a better parent. We have the worst medical insurance in the world, or I'd get us both some therapy. I was just hoping someone who had dealt with something similar would have some advice. I try to focus on anything good I can about him, but he makes it very difficult.

girlie1921 · Accepted Answer

you are not a horrible mother, you do love your child! you are a stressed out overwhelemd mother who has a son with issues that are difficult to deal with, with only having one child. ask the school nurse of she knows of places or groups you can go look up local groups online of other moms who are in the same boat as you and you can get good advice or hear what other moms or parents do. as for everyone calling you a horrible mother, they obviously don't have kids with issues have tons of help or have only one child or none at all back off and stop criticizing a mother who is actually trying!!

Anonymous · Answer

Take him to a child specialist. Do NOT commit him to a "private facility". Some of them are abusive and unorganized. Depending on where you live, I would recommend these hospitals in Chicago, IL:
RiverEdge
Hartgrove
Lakeshore
They helped my cousin's children.

Anonymous · Answer

He has A.D.H.D! What do you expect! You need to love all of your kids the same. There is a lot of classes/help you can sign him up for. The best thing for a kid to have is his/hers mothers love. If you don't give him that could severely damage his childhood.

? · Answer

That's why some people shouldn't ave kids. They think its all fun and games, but it's not. You should have stopped at number 2. Why are people over populating the world. Ugh!

Anonymous · Answer

you are a horrible mother because he's a blessing you need the help he needs a new mother good luck

? · Answer

You need counselling. This is sad to hear.

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How can I learn to love my child?

6 Answers