18 years old and having second thoughts about marriage, need older adult's advice?

I can only relate my own life to you, it may be of help to you. Never dated prior to getting engaged at 17 to my boyfriend, him 19, same scenario. Moved out of my home as soon as I learned I graduated at 17 a state away from my parents, lived with my elderly Grand Parents. Got married 2 wks. after I turned 19. Had 2 unplanned babies the first 2 yrs. After 3 yrs. of marriage, we BOTH got bored with each other. For some unknown reason, both cheated on each other. Remember, we LOVED each other!!! Got divorced at 4 yrs. of marriage. We both then did the dating, the things we should have done in our younger yrs. but just never tho't it necessary. Our children paid for our mistakes, one an adult is still paying for it yrs. later. You NEED to do the things NOW you feel you should be doing. You cannot turn back time. Please don't do things you believe you'll end up regretting as you WILL. I'm a firm believer in that things do happen for reasons. There is a reason these tho'ts have entered your mind. It has nothing to do with you caring or not caring for your girlfriend. They are things you feel you want for yourself & rite fully so. You have every reason to do & want what you choose when you choose. I agree you should take the time needed for yourself. You'll never get this chance again. You don't want to regret it. Do what you feel you need to do, do not feel a bit of guilt for it either. I believe it's something you NEED to do, please do it...best to you...:)

At 17 I was graduated and ready to go into the Army. I had all my testing done and was waiting for my 18th birthday and I'd be off. Then I ran into the guy I had the biggest crush on in high school, and we started dating. I turned 18, and he proposed after just 3 months of dating. I told my recruiting officer I was no longer joining the Army. We married when I was 19. We've been married 8 years now and are falling more in love each day.

I never wanted to "experience life on my own" like you stated. When I got with my husband, he was all I could see, and all I wanted. It was always love at first sight. The fact that you want to live life on your own is your answer. If you got married now, you'd be divorced in a matter of months to a year. If she is the one, then take some time to grow up first. Not everyone can marry so young and have it work out.

So, I think you should join the Army. If it's meant to be, she will be waiting for you when you get out. You will be more mature, stronger inside and out, you will have more experience in life and may be able to offer her more for it. Talk to her about it and see how she feels about it. No matter what you do, if she's the one, it'll happen, now or 4 years from now. Good luck.

The thing is, 10 years down the road, you two may not be the same people you were when you both were still partially kids and oved each other. People change as they mature, and a lot of changes can happen in the 20s. You are right to want time for yourself -- if you marry too early, you could end up resenting the marriage and your spouse because you didn't get that time for yourself. Go ahead and wait. If she's the one for you, she'll still be there when you're ready to get married.

Why even ask... you can see in your own writing you are not sure this is right for you. And if you are not sure then it is not right. You do not have to break up put but off marriage. Do your boot camp and wait to see where they send you after some time there and you are still together then start making plains for later down the road with her but being a military wife is not for some women..

If youre having second thoughts, you should postpone the marriage. Beside being married soo young & being seperated from your wife is gonna put a huge strain on your marriage, possibly causing both of you to cheat. I suggest getting engaged & waiting until after basic training or after your tour to get married.

You are way to young to consider marriage at your age. Considering I am 18 as well.

You change over time, especially at your age. I don't think a year and a half is enough time to really know someone either.

Wait until you are in your 20's and if things are still going good with you and her, consider it.

Right now I do agree with you, give time to yourself.

If there are things you need to do before marriage, then do them. Not involving other women however, if you love this girl. Don't feel pressured to be married now. If your having second thoughts, then give yourself time to think and do what you need to do. Don't do anything until you are sure of them.

Good luck with everything :)

umm...I'm a 40 year old woman and find no use for marriage. if you want to view marriage as a fairytale, that's your right.

just don't be upset if you and your HS sweetheart don't work out and she cheats on you while you're away for months/years at a time in the military.

I'm madly in love with my un-husband and wouldn't trade him or our relationship for anything in the world. He is the prince I wished upon a star for back in my youth, it just took until 32 to find him.

I have had friends like you. They want the wild night life they hear about. Let me tell you this. There is no wild life that can ever come close to the love of your life. They show me pictures of there x wife. WoW she was hot. They wish they had her back. My first love lift me so I became a slut so i know.Many women and many fun nights None of them as good as a wife and children jumping in your bed Saturday morning. Thank you for your service to our country.

I married when i was 17 and he was 19 and we are still together 3 years later. I never regretted it. We dated for a month and was engaged for a weekend. He is my soulmate though. If you are doubting it then maybe it's not right.