I can barely take my parents anymore?

I dislike them. I can't bring myself to say I love them cause they've hurt me too much.

So I fractured my shin 4 months ago from cross country. I loved the sport with all my heart and soul. I poured my heart into it and worked at it. That's how I fractured my shin. Running xc. I was cleared for running 3 weeks ago and have been in and out of winter track season since, but it hurts to run really hard like we are forced to. I told my mom I wanted to take spring track off so I could work out at the gym every day and get back in shape for summer and the fall season. My mom killed me and was like "you don't really love xc I knew it." And the funny thing was, she got mad at me yesterday for not using the gym membership enough. When I told her I'd go everyday, she gets mad.

I'm 5'3 and 125 pounds. I used to be anorexic last year. I got down to 100, fainted and almost had to go into treatment, but my best friend helped pull me back together and gain some weight. My mom says I'm fat like my stupid aunt who hates me.

I have curly hair and know how to make it look nice. When I straighten it people tell me never to straighten my hair again cause its so pretty curly. It's my New Years resolution not to straighten it again until next year and my mom killed me. She was like "you look so much prettier with it straight."

She didn't let me go to church one day because my hair didn't "look good enough". She get frustrated when I wear it up all the time. And once she didn't let me go to a concert because I refused to straighten my hair.

My dad has anger issues too. Not too bad but he's just rude and impatient and he scares me.

My parents provide me with food and clothes and everything so for that I'm very great full. But then the way they treat me sometimes makes me wanna kill myself (not legit I would never do this, but I think of doing it sometimes).