Funny "studies have shown" jokes?

Studies have shown that your back hurts less now than it ever will

Studies have shown that most people don't finish what....

Studies have shown that 50% of all people are half of everyone.

Studies have shown that life is the leading cause of death.

Studies have shown that studies are usually wrong and a waste of time and money.

Studies have shown that terrorists who blew themselves up are no longer a threat.

Studies have shown that casinos got their revenues from gamblers.

haha

studies have shown the higher the IQ is, the later they sleep

Study finds link between sex and pregnancy.

Study finds teen pregnancy rates significantly drop after age 27.

...that 5 out of 4 people, don't understand fractions.