I'm an artist, not a puppet. So should I care when I'm a disappointment?

The professional, paid musicians I've known are two church organists/choir directors, a college professor of music and his wife, and a married couple who play classical music gigs and give lessons on their instruments.

Both of the choir directors prepare organ music and select and rehearse choral music to fit the scheduled sermon topics. They direct an adult choir, a children's choir, and a bell choir, and prepare several special events each season such as Christmas programs and organ recitals. They sometimes take outside jobs such as giving organ lessons or acting as accompanists for other musicians. Their pay is modest – on the order of the amount public school teachers receive.

The college professor of music and his wife (also a musician) were "academic gypsies" for years, meaning they existed on one-year contracts until he eventually received tenure in his late forties. They never had children, but at last were secure enough to buy a house. He holds a doctorate in music from an Ivy League university. Until retirement several years ago, he taught four choral groups, a couple of theory classes, and some individual voice lessons, plus acting as music department chairman when his turn came around. His wife was an "adjunct professor", meaning she gave voice lessons on a part time basis, and had no benefits or tenure.

The couple lives near a large city with a lively classical music scene. They keep in constant touch with other musicians and agents so they can hear about ad-hoc, one-shot opportunities. Some of their income comes from giving lessons, and some from renting out instruments they own. Over the years they've built a good reputation, but they have to keep working at it or they'd soon be forgotten. They're friends with an old high-school buddy who went into engineering and made a really good living. This man is an expert string player, and is asked to play in small groups and large concerts. These are not usually paid gigs, but they're satisfying for all that.

Bottom line: Hoping to make a living as a professional musician is much like hoping to get into pro sports at a high enough level to get paid for it. Many are called, but few are chosen. And you have to keep pedaling hard all your life or you'll drop behind.

With your good grades, you'll be able to get into a college where you can study for a vocation that'll pay the bills, and also take classes in the visual arts and music theory, performance, etc. You'll have the chance to sing and play in ensembles, and will meet fellow students who may be a lot more advanced in art or music than you are. All in all, it will be a fine opportunity to prepare for a productive life, and evaluate whether you've got what it takes to make a career in the arts.

I think your mom was also concerned of the realities of being an artist in general- visual arts or music.

It is a challenging area since there are so many others out there. It is an area where it's the luck of the draw when it comes to being noticed and earning a decent living. This is the reality and especially the ups and downs of the economy. There is a description out there called the 'starving artist'.

I agree that you should not have to be something you are not. You should not waste your time in an area of study that you are not interested in. You should follow your interests. However, at the same time you will need to come up with a solid plan as you get older. As to how you would support yourself financially. The reality is the pay is not very well in the arts. Some get lucky and make a great living from it. However, finding steady work is not always a guarantee.

I know professionals who don't mind what they do- medicine, engineering etc. However, pursue music and art as well. Having jobs that pay the bills but continue on with their passions for the arts as well. It is not an easy area to breakthrough. So realize the reality but still follow your passions.

You will not only need to support yourself when older- you will need to pay for your college/books and one day support a family (if you have kids and marry). Perhaps help out aging parents in the future financially in anyway. It won't be about you all the time in life.

Life is about dreams and planning.

Good luck. Don't give up on any dreams.

It really sounds like you are on the right track and that you have your life together (at least in the right direction, for sure). So, I am probably your moms age (or maybe older, actually) and all I can say is try to find something where you are doing both. You should keep doing your music for sure!! At the same time, you could study general business courses, etc, etc. Always keep your hands in both (music and business) - that way, if you get a job in music, you will be set...and there may be times when you have to use the business-expertise as well, but at least you will be attempting to do what you want. Go for the best of both worlds and take your time to figure out how you can have a career in music.....

Good luck!

As a mother of five grown up guys and girls I want to tell you that you are in charge of your future. Don't let yourself be pressured to go into any type of degree, etc. just because of a parent's wish!

This doesn't mean that you should be rude; just kiss your mum and tell her that you have to follow your heart.

That's it, nothing else, don't get pulled into a discussion of any kind.