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?
Lv 6
? asked in Arts & HumanitiesBooks & Authors · 7 years ago

What do you think of this love story I am writing?

She ask him if his love is true or no.

She stood with her shoulders back & her long brown hair flowing with the wind saying "Of what worth am I to you?" Trembling at the thought of his answer he slowy replied " I have no way to place a value upon your devine beauty. within nor without.. Love would be meaningless were it not that I gave it without your return of it to me. My life only exist because of your gentle unending beauty".

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's not long enough to judge properly, but the grammar needs some work. Read the first sentence out loud, you'll see what I mean. If this takes place in modern times, the dialogue seems a bit outmoded, but if this is meant to take place long in the past it could work. Right now it's a bit over dramatic, but I'm not sure how it fits into the rest of the story.

    Good luck.

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