How do I work with an impatient boss?

I work a minimum wage job as a bus boy in a kitchen... the the head chef - who is a nice person at heart, but I find her to be extremly unapproachble. I always bust my *** trying to keep up and trying to do my job as good and as efficeintly as possible. And I do succeed.

But when it comes to making mistakes and simple errors. I have an incredibly tough time asking the head chef to repeat herself. Because she says

"Don't f**king make me repeat things, but listen to me when I speak"..

Thats fair enough and its very understandible that she would say that. but she says thing so fast, and sometimes uses words that don't seem to make sense at all. Well at least thats how I feel.

I just cannot approach her calmly, because you can anticipate the frustration and sense of bother when she yells at you for asking even a simple and reasonable question. I've got bad enough anxiety and social conduct issues, cause of past bullying, and low morale. And I am nervous and shy when I need to talk to women. no matter what the context.

I got called a "suck up" by her because I offered to do extra work. When I made a mistake in the kitchen... I mean what would I gain from sucking up to a boss at a minimum wage job? A promtion? A raise? I don't think so

What do you suggest I should do?

For the moment I am sticking with my gut instinct and shutting my mouth and turning up at work and doing my job well. How do I gain confidence to talk to an impatient and agressive boss?