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? asked in Social SciencePsychology · 7 years ago

How do I get over my fear of having a boyfriend?

I'm twenty years old and I never had a boyfriend. I've kissed a boy twice, and that was five years ago.

I'm talking to someone who seems to like me, and I sort of like him back. But what's holding me from expressing my feelings for him is that I'm scared he'll ask me to be his girlfriend.

Just, everything happened so fast. He's not a total stranger, I've seen him around campus and we've had classes before.. just he opened up too quickly. And he's not too shy to express his feelings for me, although he's never directly said, "I have a crush on you" cause he usually tip toes around it by complimenting me and saying I always make him smile, etc etc etc.

Long story short, I want to say I really like him, but I'm in deep denial. I don't want to admit it, because I'm too scared to let him know how I feel and having to be committed to a boyfriend.

I'm NOT promiscuous, but I am friendly where it's borderline flirty, and I sort of don't want to give that right away... I don't want to be committed to anyone quite frankly.

I let him know that I'm really inexperienced and that I get nervous when I like someone... so hopefully he takes it as I want to take things slow.

But how do I get over the fear of wanting to have a boyfriend... I thought long and hard and I DO want a boyfriend.. mainly because I'm curious of things other teenage girls are doing :/ but then again, I'm perfectly fine being on my own.

2 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    Honey you poor thing, there is nothing worse than our intuition. Has he done something for you to feel this way? This is a hard one, as in our own hearts we know something is not right, but just can't put our finger on it. Try to relax ( i know that is easy for me to say ), and see how things go from there, cause if you keep stressing over it, it can make you really sick. Does this girl have a boyfriend? Don't worry about the dreams, they are just representing you insecurities, but you do need to relax, and don't break up with him over your being suspicious, that would break your heart even more. Just take some time to really think it through. Good Luck honey. Minny

  • 7 years ago

    Play the field with no interest or thought of being with just one guy.

    You'll know if THAT guy shows up and makes you focus on just him.

    Don't restrict yourself this early.

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