What to do when your husband says he wants space or more freedom...?

U tell him to grow up. Fun days are over for him forever. He wanted to go out shouldnt have married u

When you get married and have a child, your responsibilities change. There's nothing wrong with wanting to hang out with friends and get out of the house for a bit, but excessive partying and staying out all hours of the night when you are at home alone with the kids to me doesn't seem okay. I'm a little older than you so I know when I was 24 I wanted to do what I wanted and party and not have responsibilities but I also wasn't married or have children. I understand his urge but he does have responsibilites. I would try sitting down with him and having a serious talk. Try to talk to him about this in a way where you aren't telling him he's wrong or get angry. Try to explain to him that you are all for occasionally going out with friends, and partying and you trust him to do that responsibly, but you don't understand why he has to do it all the time, without you and stay out so late. Could you try to compromise? Or occasionally ask him to invite you out for some fun? I'd try to really hit home that you trust him but you want to spend time as a family as well, and you know it's hard and he has a lot of responsibilities and going out is release. I think if you get on his level and make it clear that you understand his need, he will be more receptive to what you have to say. I think where he gets defensive is he feels you don't trust him, and you think he's being irresponsible, so if you stay away from those topics, he will less likely be defensive.

You should divorce the guy.

He is out until 4 in the morning at clubs and bars with horny girls and men and leaving you home alone with the kid, OF COURSE you are going to ask questions and snoop around, who the hell stays out that late and doesn't come home like that ? He should be at home sleeping in bed with you.

You shouldn't have gotten pregnant by a manchild but now it's too late. You will catch an std because he is out having sex with whores who phuck a different guy everytime they go out. DO NOT have sex with this guy unless you want an std, he is not treating you as his wife.

He just puts the blame on you because causing an argument gives him the excuse to storm off to the bars and clubs and come home late.

Divorce the loser

"I have trust issues because of an ex husband" - LOSE THEM NOW. Your current husband is not your ex husband. You've no right to 'punish' him because of what someone else did. Treat your husband as an individual, and not as a clone of someone you feel wronged by, or you'll kill your relationship.

"he has issues with me not trusting him and snooping" - Of course he does! Any reasonable person would. You shouldn't have married him if you didn't trust him. Your issues are YOURS. Fix them. Get counseling or whatever you need to do, or you'll lose another husband and this time it will be all on you.

"This last month he's been going out a lot and staying out till the next morning" - That's not okay, but it does sound like he's spending his time where he has fun, instead of where he's grilled, spied on, and treated like a criminal.

"he was forced into fatherhood too soon" - if he didn't want to be a father, he should've been using condoms and ensured his partner was on a good form of b/c. Otherwise, he was accepting the risk of fatherhood, so has no right to be upset by it.

Yeah, he is probably wanting to live those wild carefree party days that many have in their late teens/early 20s. That doesn't mean he isn't cheating, but it doesn't mean he is. What it DOES mean is that he shouldn't have married someone if he wanted to act like a singleton. There was no reason for you two to marry. He could've been a father to his child without tying his life down with a marriage he clearly didn't want.

The odds of your marriage lasting aren't high. He doesn't want to be married. You don't trust him. You're miserable when he's doing what he wants. He's miserable when he's not out playing and pretending he's not a husband/father. Your best option would be couples counseling to see if he's willing to accept the responsibility he chose when he helped create a child an chose to marry you. Otherwise, it might actually be best to set him free. At least then you wouldn't have to worry if he was cheating on you or feel bad because you're sitting at home with your child while your husband is out partying with his friends all night.