I need some information?

Shhhh, not to loud.

Contact Captain Paramenter or Corporal Aegon at SHEAF Headquarters. They'll take care of you right quick.

The commanding officer is the gallant but chronically clumsy Captain Wilton Parmenter, descended from a long line of distinguished military officers. He is awarded the Medal of Honor after accidentally instigating the final charge at the Battle of Appomattox. Only a private in the Quartermaster Corps, he is ordered to fetch the commanding officer's laundry (with the inference that it is General Grant's laundry). As he rides away to get the laundry he repeatedly sneezes. A group of Union soldiers mistake his sneezing for an order to charge, turning the tide of the battle and "earning" Parmenter the nickname "The Scourge of Appomattox". He is also awarded the (then non-existent) Purple Heart after he is accidentally pricked in the chest by his commanding officer while receiving his first medal – "the only soldier in history to get a medal for getting a medal".[5] His superiors, wishing to reward his action, promote him to captain and give him command of remote Fort Courage, a dumping ground for misfit Soldiers.

You'll fit right in with that super duper secret group. You be working alongside those brave Native American hero's. The Hekawi Indians.

Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin' with no makeup on. It's way too early in this relationship for you to put in so little effort.

It's a secret....... you won't know until you enlist, and you're specifically selected.

Be quiet, will ya. You might wake them.