To much fighting, I dont know how to end it?

Question

Me and my boyfriend fight about the smallest thing, and in the back of my mind I know we arent for each other. He cheated on me by talking to so many girls on snapchat, really hurt me, he was flirting and asking for nudes etc. I always bring it up because it really ****** me up, he wants to move past and he knows I dont trust him. He always tells me that hes sorry he did it but at the time we would argue to much and he needed it, thats bullshit if you ask me, how do you break up with someone you really want to be with?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Anonymous,

You  ask how you can break up with somebody you want to be with.  Your boyfriend is too immature and not ready for a real relationship, from what you've described, so I wonder why you want to be with him at all.  I can see from you post that on one level you want to be together, but on another you want to break up.  I think you should break up with him. Here are some thoughts:

1. If you decide to try to patch up your relationship, spend some time apart from each other.  While you are away from each other, you will have time to think over how the relationship is going and whether or not it is worth continuing.  After some time apart, you will decide whether you want to stay together or not. (I think you will decide to leave him.)  Don't break up for good until you've had some time away from him to think it over.  While you are away from him, you will decide how your life will be without him.  Breaking up puts a strain on a relationship (if you decide to get back together again at a later time), so take your time making your decision.

2. If after a period of separation you decide that you can see things clearly (they aren't going well) find a good place and time to break up with him.  You should be alone somewhere where it is quiet.  You don't want to be in a place that the two of you shared good memories.  You want someplace neutral.

3. Speak with him calmly.  Talk about the good things that you had in your relationship, and then lead up then lead up the the reasons why the relationship won't work.  That will take the drama out of the the break-up and make it easier for him to handle.  Avoid pointing fingers.  Remember that it takes two to create a relationship, and both of you are responsible for maintaining it.

4. Make sure you break up with him in person.  Don't break up by text.  This enables you to have s conversation about the relationship and bring closure to it.

5. When you get together for your final talk, be ready with what you are going to say to him.  Try to think of what he might say to you and be prepared to answer his comments.

Relationships should be built of trust.  If your boyfriend is acting the way he is, you can't really trust him.  He isn't dedicated enough to you to maintain a great relationship.  There really are nicer guys out there who will build you up and not act the way your boyfriend does.  Get rid of the one you have.  Also think about yourself and what you've learned from this relationship.  We all learn life's lessons from the relationships we've had.  They carry over into the next relationship so that we don't make the mistakes that we have made in the past.  Best wishes.

♠ Merlin ♠ · Answer

[name] you cheated and i no longer trust you
i deserve better, goodbye

and walk away and block him from everything
you are wasting precious life on this guy who has no respect for you
until you have more self worth you will continue to waste more of your life on him
he cant take back or change what he has done, and you will never be happy with him
cut your losses, immediately

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To much fighting, I dont know how to end it?

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