Why did my bf say "idk if this is going to work on the long run"?

Question

My bf (29) and I(26) have been going out for 2yrs.
And I recently moved in with him almost 2 months ago, and today we got in an argument, and I had asked when are we getting married, and he said I'm not ready yet, and  I asked why, and he said "I don't know if this is going to work in the long run"

Since the beginning of our relationship I had told him I wanted to get married before I'm 28 and have kids before 30, and he agreed all this time, but today he changed his mind all of a sudden..

I don't want a big wedding, I just want to marry him..

Why is he being like this?
Am I wasting my time?

Please help.

Liz · Answer

Why is he acting like this?  Because you moved in with him.

Think about it...he's getting all the things you normally get with marriage - a housemate to share bills with, regular free sex, a companion to spend time with, a live-in maid.  And he's getting all those things without having to give you the commitment that comes with marriage in return.

Think of it like shopping.  Would you pay full price for an item if you knew you could get it on sale?  Of course you wouldn't.  Neither would your boyfriend.  Your mistake was the fact that you put yourself on sale, metaphorically speaking.

You think that just because you stated that you want to be married by 28 and a parent by age 30, and because he never spoke up and said he disagreed, that meant that you and he were on the same page.  You aren't and you never were.  He's happy with the status quo and he sees no reason to change anything.  His needs are being met.  Yours are going begging.  You need to move out and move on.

? · Answer

It simply means that he is not yet committed to you..
He wants the benefits of marriage without the responsibilities 
Yes, you probably are wasting your time

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Why did my bf say "idk if this is going to work on the long run"?

2 Answers