Would you adopt this child?

Question

First: You do not get to say this child would never exist, the mother is based off a real person and the likely reactions to pregnancy.

The Mother: A LGBT college student with depression, anxiety, ADHD and is autistic with a history of breast and ovary cancer. Due to mental disabilities has still not been able to move out of parents and had to be homeschooled for middle and high school. Mother during the first month or so continued drinking alcohol not aware of her pregnancy, she was on medicine for depression and ADHD and medical marijuana for the anxiety during the entirety as she needs it to function. She also was under deep stress due to the pregnancy coming from assault and medical history of deadly or dangerous pregnancies which could be undiagnosed PSTD.  She has no desire to have contact and openly dislikes children.

Father: Completely unknown assailant for now

The child could be: autistic, LGBT, have problems due to PSTD or anything else the mother suffered during pregnancy, development problems due to consumption of alcohol and prescription medicine, need more care than the average child to be raised, have ADHD and depression, a dangerous medically future and unknown qualities from the father.

They could also want to meet their birth parents, who remember: one doesn't want to meet the child and the other is a criminal.

Also in some states, the rapist can get some parental rights of a child conceived during assault who you would have to deal with

Ranchmom1 · Answer

Yes. Our oldest daughter who became part of our family as a teenager was exposed to alcohol and drugs in the womb, has a long family history of anxiety, depression, and other disorders, has a father and grandfather who are criminals, has ADD, has PTSD from her nightmare of a childhood, and has chronic nerve pain and migraines  - and is a delightful person whom we love and wouldn't trade for the world.  : )

Anonymous · Answer

That is just asking for trouble.  My wife's best friend adopted a baby who was both a crack-baby and had FAS.  She tried everything to help this kid lead a normal life but every day of her own life was hell until the kid died crashing a stolen motorcycle into a wall at 16.

Let someone else or the state raise these broken children.  I'm not Jesus.  I don't have a compulsion to sacrifice my well-being to clean up after other people's problems and mistakes.

Lizzy · Answer

Yes obviously I am adopted. I will always be open to adopting a baby no mater anything it has. My mother drank and did drugs while she was pregnant with me. I came out perfectly fine, but I have ADHD, from things that happened in the house when I lived with my bio parents I have PTSD, ODD, and I am bipolar from my mother. And still I was adopted

Saut de Chat · Answer

No

Anonymous · Answer

If I was financially ready and stable enough.

doctormcgoveran · Answer

I would not adopt any child.

abcdef · Answer

Since I don't "get to say this child would never exist" I'll simply say that ALL children deserve to have caring and involved parents.  While I cannot adopt a child with many needs and disabilities due to circumstances, there are people who would and should adopt this child.
What rings artificial about this is your description of the mother who a "college student with depression, anxiety, ADHD and is autistic with a history of breast and ovary cancer" AND has "mental disabilities" and takes a huge amount of medication.  This is quite an accomplishment for a woman so described.

Anonymous · Answer

A college student who's had breast and ovarian cancer? Do you mean a FAMILY history?

No, I wouldn't adopt a child whose mother suffered from such serious issues and whose father was a total unknown.

I might point out that if the father is unknown, he doesn't know anything about the pregnancy.  He's highly unlikely to pop up and seek parental rights, not least since doing so would subject him to a rape charge.  If he did suddenly appear, he'd have to fight for his rights in court -- paying a lawyer to do so.  I don't think adoptive parents would have anything to worry about there, if they did decide to adopt the child.

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Would you adopt this child?

8 Answers