08 hhr running hot instantly! As soon as I start the car it gets so hot all the coolant boils out of the breather on overflow tank?

Quick overheat (after several minutes of operation) usually means that the thermostat has failed and is stuck closed. 

BUT, if during the initial problem, before replacing the thermostat, you drove the vehicle in an overheated condition, this abuse could have warped the aluminum cylinder head, which then opens up a new pile of possible symptoms of the leaking cylinder head gasket.  One being combustion pressure in the cooling system, which could force coolant out.  It could be cool but coming out so violently that it appears to be overheated.  What does your instrument panel temperature gauge show?

Have your coolant chemical tested for combustion gasses present. 

Check your engine oil.  Whitish or yellowish looking oil that resembles a milk shake is another symptom. 

Steam (white or light gray colored smoke) coming out of the exhaust pipe is another symptom. 

While the symptoms show a leaking cylinder head gasket, the problem is the cylinder head is warped, and that is the extra expense when repairing the leaking cylinder head gasket.  The cylinder head must be repaired or replaced. 

-Engine overhaul mechanic and general automotive mechanic since 1972

Blown head gasket. Get rid of that POS.

There is a SERIOUS problem with your story. A FLAME THROWER wouldn't heat the engine that quickly. Complete lack of temperature sensors and coolant couldn't cause the what you describe.

Head gasket is shot.