What is a funny bathroom joke you can tell me?

OK...guy goes to his doctor because he's been "stopped up" for five days.

The doctor tells him to stop at the pharmacy and buy a package of suppositories, and to call him back in two days if they haven't worked.

The guy gets the suppositories, and they do nothing for him.  So he calls the doctor.  The doctor tells him, "I'm going to call in a scrip to your pharmacy for a prescription-strength suppository.  They come three to a package.  Use them two hours apart, and call me tomorrow and let me know how they did.'

The guy calls the next day.  "Doc, they didn't do a thing.  I'm STILL stopped up."

The doctor asks him, "Are you following the directions and using them properly?"

And the guy says, "Doc what the hell do you think I'm doing, shoving them up my @$$?"

toil;et get it?

After making love, the man excused himself and went into the bathroom.

When he returned, the woman sat up in bed and remarked, "I can tell you are a doctor by the way you washed your hands before and after. "

"Well, that's right, " the fellow said with a self-satisfied grin. "Do you know what kind?"

The woman replied, " I would say an anesthesiologist. "

"How did you know?", asked the M.D.

She responded , " Because throughout the entire procedure, I did not feel a thing. "

Here I SIT....... Broken HEARTED...... Tried to ****....... "BUTT" only FARTED.......😂😂😂😂

Bath tub says to the toilet, " I see just as much as asss you do and don't have to take all that shiit!"

bathroom jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2

The only place that remind you of your naked childhood.

A five year old girl asked her dad where poo comes from. He tried to explain in simple terms how your tummy breaks down the food into good bits the body needs and the bad bits it doesn’t become poo.

The girl looked confused and then asked “ what about Tigger then?”

I went into a restroom & there was a big sign in there that said "DO NOT FLUSH ANYTHING OTHER THAT TOILET PAPER!"

So people were writing things under the sign with magic marker like

"Fine, I'll take my shits elsewhere" &

"These directions are so unclear that people are starting to poop in the sinks"

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?

.

Because the P is silent!