How do I get over the fact that a book ending was spoiled for me 5 years ago?

Question

There is a book series that is my favorite and I love to go back and reread it from time to time. When I first read the series, I was the only one in my class who had read the books. Because I regularly read the book during school, another girl in my class who I wasn't particularly friends with started reading the series too. Well as I was getting closer to finishing the last book of the series, she decided to (even though she had not yet started the book) google how the book ended. She told me that she knew the ending of the book and asked if I wanted to know, I said I didn't want to know and I told her firmly not to tell me how it ended as I was currently reading it. She asked if I was sure and I said yes. Well, for some reason  (and with a smile on her face) she decided to tell me the ending anyway. I was devastated because I wouldn't have predicted the ending. 
If it had been an accident, I would have gotten over it. 
But, she had intentionally spoiled it for me. And although we later became friends in highschool, I still get a twinge of anger every time I think of what she did. And what's even worse is that what she did has soured the book for me. Even though I have lately reread the other books in the series, I can't bring myself to reread the book that was spoiled, and I remember the book unpleasantly even though at the time I had liked it. It didn't dawn on me until recently that the reason I didn't like the book now was because of this. How do I get over this?

Zac Z · Answer

I think I understand you. I would be furious in a situation like this and I don't know if I could be friends with such a person. What she did was a phenomenal dіck move that one does not do.

I guess, it's possible that she isn't much of a reader and didn't realize how much of a dіck she was but from what you write she did it on purpose.

If you guys are really friends now, have you ever talked to her about this? Have you told her how much she hurt you?
I think if I were in your place I might be able to forgive someone if I had the impression that this someone is genuinely remorseful.
Talk to her. If she is a true friend now and realizes how much she hurt you she will tell you that she's sorry and show you that she really is. This might break the very negative connotations that you have with this book.

All that said, I would also recommend you to put these books aside for longer. There are sooo many great books out there. Give it more time; you'll realize that in another 5 or 10 years you'll have forgotten so many details that you will be able to read the series again and re-discover all these things like for the first time. Focus on that rather than the ending that was spoiled the first time. This has happened and it won't change. But there is much more to a book that just knowing how it ends. Otherwise, folks wouldn't reread books at all!

Marli · Answer

Forgive her. Tell yourself that you forgive her and will let the negative feelings toward her die. Tell yourself that every time you see her and think of that ruined ending.

What is more important to you: your friendship or your resentment?

If it's your friendship, consciously put your memories behind you. Walk away from it.  Read other books for the next five years.

If you don't forgive and forget, your resentment will kill your friendship.

Cogito · Answer

You try to grow up and accept that life is rarely perfect.
Holding on to anger after five years is very immature, pointless and unintelligent.

BuzzyBee · Answer

Read a different book, be friends with nice people. I think someone who spoils a book you are enjoying should be banned from your life, lol.

? · Answer

She pwned you good, but you later became friends. If that friendship is/was real, then realize that the story she ruined was not real--it is fiction and always will be. Ultimately, it's the betrayal that seems to be bothering you, and not the ruined plot twist. If you can't forgive, it only hurts you. Forgive that 16 year old version of her because that version no longer exists--therefore you are bothered by a long dead entity. It's dead, you're not, so there's your closure.

Anonymous · Answer

Why are you rereading the series five years later? There are thousands of books out there. Try reading some of those. Move on already.

Anonymous · Answer

You have to realize teenage and younger kids don't have fully developed brains until they reach an older age.

Blame her actions on her immature brain cells at the time which she had no control over, then forget it and move on to enjoy your book again.

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How do I get over the fact that a book ending was spoiled for me 5 years ago?

7 Answers