nellyenno

Mine would be absolutely no guests, opening presents with hubby in bed with glass of sherry around 10.30 am. Then on with the Xmas lunch (part prepped the day before, so nice and easy) and the whole day in our pyjamas with plenty to drink and some nice old films to watch. How's about you all?

I've had a little time at home and decided to investigate the Jeremy Kyle show. Every show seems to involve a chav couple with both claiming the other has cheated, and ultimately, the chav man doesn't believe one or other of the dozen children are his, so there is a paternity test. Are there any other issues dealt with on this show?

Recently I was involved in an email exchange with a colleague who had just left the organisation where we had a good old moan about the management (or lack of it). Unknowingly, my emails were being monitored, and as they trawled through my 'sent mails' folder, it was suggested that this sort of thing might be construed as 'gross misconduct'. Can this be right?

What is this thing you all have going on with jeans that are so many sizes too large for you that your a** is almost completely exposed? Do we want to see your underpants - no. Do you seriously check your rear view in the mirror and give yourself a thumbs up when you see that your bum cheeks are resting on top of your waistband? Why do you do this? As an advertisement of availability for the gay market? Are you all rent boys? Why do you do it?

I don't get on with my out-laws, esp. the old FIL, but there is a wedding coming up this month and I don't know what to do. My man won't go without me, and I really don't feel that I want to go all the way up North to a wedding where I am going to be dealing with constant aggression, but if I don't go, then neither will he.

Has anyone else had to deal with this scenario? The FIL is a complete Neanderthal - absolutely no chance of agreeing a 'cease-fire' there (I only shoot in self-defence myself) and the rest of them just herd behind him like sheep. Attending this wedding could mean that the resulting agression could spoil the day for the couple getting married - which I wouldn't want. My man is too scared of his father to deal with him properly. I'm for not going - what does anyone think?

Lets say that you spot them but they haven't yet got you in their gunsights. You have moments to act. Do you whip out sunglasses and a hat/headscarf and make like incognito? Or do you neck your drink and leg it away from the event before you get collared?

I love to get my hair done, but the end result is always disappointing because my hair is baby fine. At home I load it up with volumising products, back comb it and fix it with hairspray. In the salon they load it up with conditioner which just makes it even slipperier and more impossible to style, blow dry it flat to my head and don't spray it, so that by the time I have gone two steps from the salon it looks like thin rats-tails. Fine hair needs a specialist approach - loads and loads of product on it to take away the silkiness, and definately not to be blow dried flat to the head! Then you have to 'seal the moment' with hair spray - otherwise you just wasted all of your time. Why can't hairdressers deal with this? Fine hair isn't like normal people's hair. It is really impossible to style. If I was a man I would just get my head shaved, but that isn't really an option for me as a woman.

The recent murder of goth, Sophie who tried to protect her boyfriend from being killed by teen thugs makes me wonder. Why do bling encrusted, shaven headed, baggy clothes wearing, teenage boys think there is some crime in looking different to them? I mean, they are retards from where I stand, but what gives them the right to kick a young girl to death? Why do people like that behave like monsters?

I find that class does matter. Not so much to the middle classes who are more cosmopolitan, but to the traditional 'working class' who seem to pride themselves on virtual illiteracy, poor manners and an ability to reproduce for England. It is markedly worse in the North. Why?????

If your partner of twenty years was loving and affectionate to your face, but you discovered he was pulling you to pieces behind your back to his family - who don't like you by the way - would it make him a coward, desperate for their approval, or would you wonder if he was really wanting out of the relationship??

This is uber serious please. No wise guys. Given the widespread problems that alcoholics face, how is it possible to beat the constant craving for a drink? If you generally drink when you are sad, lonely, anxious or stressed, what else can compensate? And how do you have fun without the mind altering effects of drink?

This is one for any of you girls who know about nails - or maybe a chiropodist, please. My big toenails on both feet have been gradually turning vaguely yellowish. All the other toenails are completely ok. At first I thought it was wearing red toe polish, because I do know that can leave a yellow stain, but I have let my nails 'breathe' for a good couple of months now and no improvement. As I say, it is just the big toenails that are like this. Any clues?

Is it something any beauty salon will do? What does it cost (UK currency please). How often do you need to get it repeated? And if you see your beautician in the street a week later, can you still look her in the eye and say hello, or do you need to dive behind a parked vehicle and hope she passes by real soon? Serious answers please!