Jewelle

My in-laws are truly awful people. My husband endured all kinds of abuse as a child (drug abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse), and as a result he carries that pain with him always. He no longer has any contact with them, as suggested by his therapist.

Unfortunately, members of his family regularly try to contact him, and every time they do he gets extremely anxious. He's working on the anxiety issues in therapy, but for now they need to leave him alone so he can work on getting stronger. They try to make him feel guilty for "abandoning" them, and that makes him feel even worse.

Since he wants no contact with them, and since they won't leave him alone, do you think it would be a good idea for me to say something to them? What could I say that would make them understand the pain he goes through and how he would be better off without them for now?

He couldn't contact them himself. Even the thought of having a conversation with them sends him into an anxiety attack.

I tagged a guy in the comments under a photo on Facebook, and it didn't show up on his timeline.

I have no problems tagging other people and having it show up on their timelines, and other people have tagged him and it has shown up on his timeline immediately.

Does this just happen sometimes? Or, is the only way this disappeared because he removed it from his timeline?

He only has a couple of girls besides me on his friend list, so maybe he's embarrassed by a girl tagging him. Perhaps he's worried his mom will notice and make a big deal about it. lol

If that's the case, I won't tag him anymore.

A little background: I'm married. My husband is my best friend, but our relationship is more platonic than romantic. I don't see other people, although he has in the past.

I have a mad crush on a guy we both know. I told my husband about the crush, so he's totally aware of my feelings. I have a pretty good idea that this guy likes me too. We have a lot in common, and I think he's a pretty awesome person and I have a lot of respect for him. He's the kind of guy I would feel honored to call a friend regardless of the crush (I have lots of guy friends).

What do you think I should do? Should I friendzone him immediately and try to get over the crush? Or should I just see where things go?

I originally posted this in Women's Health, but thought I might have more luck in this category.

I'd like to know if anyone has experienced withdrawal effects when quitting Yasmin or Yaz. I've been on Yasmin (Yaz for a while) for over 10 years, and I've finally connected this awful stuff with my extreme anxiety/panic disorder.

I developed a panic disorder less than a year after starting Yasmin. It just came out of nowhere. Over the years I had developed other medical conditions, and was finally diagnosed with celiac disease. I just assumed that celiac was the cause of all my problems.

About 6 weeks ago I stopped taking Yasmin. I'm not even sure why - but it just felt right. After a week or so I felt like the old me again, and was so comfortable, socially outgoing, and fun like I hadn't been in years. I started taking Yasmin again about two weeks ago (because I'm an idiot?), and a week ago I started to have extreme anxiety and panic attacks again. There's no way this is a coincidence.

So I'm going to stop taking Yasmin FOR GOOD starting today. But I've heard of people having all kinds of withdrawal symptoms, such as worsening anxiety, hair loss, and other side effects. I'd like to know what other people experienced coming off of this horrible drug so I'll know what I can expect.

Thanks! I'm looking forward to claiming my life back.

I'd like to know if anyone has experienced withdrawal effects when quitting Yasmin or Yaz. I've been on Yasmin (Yaz for a while) for over 10 years, and I've finally connected this awful stuff with my extreme anxiety/panic disorder.

I developed a panic disorder less than a year after starting Yasmin. It just came out of nowhere. Over the years I had developed other medical conditions, and was finally diagnosed with celiac disease. I just assumed that celiac was the cause of all my problems.

About 6 weeks ago I stopped taking Yasmin. I'm not even sure why - but it just felt right. After a week or so I felt like the old me again, and was so comfortable, socially outgoing, and fun like I hadn't been in years. I started taking Yasmin again about two weeks ago (because I'm an idiot?), and a week ago I started to have extreme anxiety and panic attacks again. There's no way this is a coincidence.

So I'm going to stop taking Yasmin FOR GOOD starting today. But I've heard of people having all kinds of withdrawal symptoms, such as worsening anxiety, hair loss, and other side effects. I'd like to know what other people experienced coming off of this horrible drug so I'll know what I can expect.

Thanks! I'm looking forward to claiming my life back.

I asked a question about a guy friend earlier, and one of the comments said that a guy would only be friends with a girl if he liked her in a "more than just friends" kind of way. I don't feel this way, but it makes me wonder how many other people think this.

Do you think a guy could legitimately be friends with a girl, without having any feelings for her? If not, can you explain why?

I'd like to find out what other people think.

I'm a tomboy, so I mostly hang out with guys. I do like hanging out with girls - it's just that most girls I meet don't have a lot in common with me.

One of my guy friends and I share a lot of secrets and confide a lot in each other. But recently I've gotten the feeling that he likes me a bit more than just a friend. I'm not interested in having a relationship with him because I'm married and he's more like a little brother to me than anything.

For the past few weeks it seems like he's avoiding me, and things sometimes feel a little awkward. What do you think I should do about it? Maybe give him some space, or just act like I usually do as if nothing has changed?

Guys - what would you do if you were in that situation with a female friend?

A few months ago I had a horrible pap exam. It really hurt, and I bled for over a week afterwards. The pap results came back normal, and the doctor didn't find anything wrong in the physical exam either.

But now I can feel a bump inside my vagina that wasn't there before. Sort of a small cyst. Do you think it's possible that the doctor caused damage during the pap, and that has caused a cyst to grow? Should I get it checked out, or just not worry about it?

That was the first time I have ever had a bad experience with a pap exam.

I know this question has probably been asked a billion times before, but I'm just curious.

When I look at the "Find friends" page in Facebook I'm wondering how those people end up there. Some of them are obvious, such as people who share multiple friends with me, and people who went to the same schools, etc.

But, the top two people (who have been there for a few days) are confusing to me. The top one is the boyfriend of a male friend of mine. We only have two friends in common (I have over a dozen friends in common with other people on the list). I've been reading that if someone looks at your profile a lot it could push them up in your friend suggestions. Does this sound right? I'm wondering if he's scoping me out because he lives a couple of hours away from here, and maybe he's jealous that I hang out with his boyfriend a lot.

The second one on the list also only has two friends in common with me. This guy is a friend of my husband, and is an awesome photographer. His profile is open, so I've spent quite some time browsing the pictures in his profile because they are amazing. Does that mean that I've probably popped up on the top of his "find friends" list and he probably thinks I'm stalking him? lol Or, does that even count, and he has probably been looking at my profile too?

A friend of mine recently revealed to me that she had been sexually abused as a kid. She said she doesn't want to talk about it, but I'm not so sure. I wasn't sure what to say at the time. I feel like she would tell me because she wanted to discuss it, even though she said she didn't really want to talk about it. Maybe she just wanted to tell someone to share it with another person. I have no idea if she has told anyone else before.

What would you do in this situation?

I asked this in "Friends" and no one responded, so maybe this section can help me out.

When I say "friend crush" I mean when you meet a person and you really want to become their friend because it seems like you'd get along really well - NOT the other kind of crush where you have a sexual attraction.

I met this guy recently, and we have a lot in common - one interest in particular that none of my current friends share with me. We hang out at the same place, and he seems like the kind of person I would want as a friend (I've always had lots of guy friends because I'm a tomboy).

But, he seems sort of shy and doesn't seem to hang out with any other girls.

What's a good strategy to approach a shy guy to be just friends without making him feel uncomfortable and without making him think I'm coming on to him? What kinds of things should I say?

When I say "friend crush" I mean when you meet a person and you really want to become their friend because it seems like you'd get along really well - NOT the other kind of crush where you have a sexual attraction.

I met this guy recently, and we have a lot in common - one interest in particular that none of my current friends share with me. We hang out at the same place, and he seems like the kind of person I would want as a friend (I've always had lots of guy friends because I'm a tomboy).

But, he seems sort of shy and doesn't seem to hang out with any other girls.

What's a good strategy to approach a shy guy to be just friends without making him feel uncomfortable and without making him think I'm coming on to him? What kinds of things should I say?

I'm married, but I have a lot of guy friends. I've had kind of a crush on a couple of them over the years, but I have no intentions of ever cheating.

Do you think it's okay to be married and still have a crush on other people, as long as you have no intentions of ever acting on it?

My husband is pretty down on himself all the time. He has many talents, but he only ever looks at people who are better than him. He has no self-confidence and it's ruining our marriage.

I have a successful career and went really far with my education, so he thinks that I'm a more successful and talented person than he is. It's to the point where he doesn't even see us as equals anymore, and he says my success makes him feel worthless. Any time he can possibly take a jab at me over anything he does, and he says it's because it makes him feel better. He's turning into a really spiteful person over this.

What can I do to make him see that he doesn't need to accomplish great things to impress me, and he doesn't have to feel bad about himself if he isn't the best at everything all the time?

I didn't like my husband's family from day one. There are too many issues with them to list here, but I told him that I didn't care if he saw them or not as long as he didn't expect me to go with him. He was fine with that.

After a year or so he decided he couldn't stand them anymore either, and he stopped talking to them too. It was to the point where they would only call if they needed something anyway, and he was just so sick of their constant drama and criminal activity.

Now, many years later, some of them keep trying to get back in touch with us. My husband has changed his cell phone number, and we've moved, so it's not like they can call us or just drop by our house. But they keep sending Facebook messages, and now some of them have found my work number and try to call me at work!!

This is getting really annoying. It's not on the level of harassment, and we were hoping that if we ignored them they would just go away. They aren't.

What do you think we should do? I don't think responding to them and asking them to leave us alone would be a good idea because they are total drama queens and would probably start a huge fight over it.

What would you do?

I've had a bit of play in my steering wheel for the last few months (about 1/2" of play). It's more annoying than anything, and I'd like to tighten it up. I found this article online: http://www.valvoline.com/car-care/automotive-syste...

Would you recommend adjusting the slack in the rack and pinion like this? Could something else in the steering column cause slack?

By the way, I have new tie rods, recently had a damaged ball joint replaced, and had an adjustment within the last month. Mechanic found nothing else that looked bad on the front end.

In Genesis 6 it says:

"Now it came about, when men began to multiply on the face of the land, and daughters were born to them, that the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful; and they took wives for themselves, whomever they chose."

Does this mean that lots of sons of God were born, like Jesus, and they has sex with some unknown creature to produce human females, who they then married?

I just don't get it. If the men produced daughters and then married them, who were the mothers of the daughters? And does this mean the men had premarital sex?

And doesn't this also mean that women get no say in who they marry?

My husband and I have been married for ten years, and have no children. We don't want children, feel completely fulfilled without children, and don't even really like children (especially babies).

But some people won't stop hassling us about having kids. It's a constant "When are you having kids" "Don't leave it too late or you'll regret it" "It's selfish not to have kids"

Some people have even admitted to us that they hated raising kids and that everyone should have to go through what they went through. Yeah...right! Several other parents have admitted feeling jealous of our freedom, and said that if they had to do it all over again they would choose to be childless. They felt pressured by society and family to have kids, and didn't even realize not having them was an option. How sad.

I've given the annoying people every answer I can, from "I'm not having kids" to "Leave me alone, you're bugging me." I've even stopped talking to people over this, and have lost a lot of friends because they had kids and now we can't relate to each other.

I want a response to give these people that actually makes them understand that it's okay not to have kids, and it's rude to assume married couples have to have kids.

Got any good snappy comebacks?

I didn't know there was such a thing as "extended weening", but now that I've heard about it I think it's disgusting. These mothers are nursing their children up to the age of four, and sometimes even older. And even do it in public!

Here's an article about one crazy lady who breastfeeds her 3-year-old on the subway: http://blogs.babycenter.com/celebrities/mayim-bial...

I don't have a problem with mothers breastfeeding their babies, even in public. It's natural and socially acceptable.

But what about a 4+ year old? Where should we draw the line? What if a mother decided to breastfeed an 8 year old, 10 year old, 16 year old! When does it stop becoming mothering and start becoming weird and abusive?

The kid in that article sounds totally messed up. Should SRS get involved in cases like this? Is there some kind of sexual deviancy going on with these mothers?

These days when someone claims to hear the voice of God we understand that they are mentally ill and give them treatment. For example, when a mother claims that God tells her to kill her child, we know that she has issues with her mental health and didn't actually receive those instructions from God.

How do we know that the characters in the Bible really got their instructions from God and weren't actually mentally ill? After all, diagnosis and treatment was pretty sketchy back then, and many people with a mental illness were either persecuted for being possessed or exulted for being holy.

Is it a coincidence that the more we understand about mental illness, the less cases there are of communication with God?