sweety8904

He knows, he knows it has happened more than once. He knows one of the people but not the others. My issue is I have asked him if he forgives me and he just looks at me, he doesn't say a word. The other day we were out together and he told me, "I never said I forgive you, but I also never said I don't. You can't forgive yourself which is why you hate yourself." Once he said that I broke down and cried, I never thought of that.

The one reason I hate myself, to think or contemplate suicide, is because I can't forgive myself for hurting him so much. He has been such a great man to stick with me after everything I have done to him. We have been together for almost 6 years now, and this all started about 3 years ago.

As much as I hate to hurt him again I need to ask for a break, not to be with other people, but to learn how to forgive and love myself again. This decision was because last night as I told him that the one thing that scares me most, is if he did what I did to him. I know karma is a b*tch and I deserve anything that happens. But in my dream he had just told me that he had sex with my best friend in the beginning of our relationship but kept it from me until now. He than showed me a sex tape he made with her (She is a virgin in real life and lives about 3 hours away and neither drives) but when I woke up this morning I had a very sad, depressed cloud looming over me. I wanted to die, I felt how he felt when I had told him and I couldn't stand anything.

In my past I have attempted suicide before, cut, and had an eating disorder. All self destructive and very bad, I've been trying to cope with everything. But this morning, I wanted to end it all. I feel so unworthy and a waste to anyone who meets me. I need help, I need to learn how to forgive myself and I need to do it soon before I do, do something. I have no insurance to go to a physiologist and I can't talk to anyone I know because their view is 'you did this yourself, if it makes you feel better do it already.'

Okay, so my fiance and I want to do a beauty and the beast theme, we are aware of copy right issues which is why I need to contact Disney to get written consent for our outfits to be custom made to the characters. I tried looking up legal departments and all of that other stuff but can't find where to write to, to ask for permission to go ahead with this theme. Better safe then sorry.

Okay now this may sound gross, but please keep an open mind. So I started my period and my boyfriend and I had some fun, well I had my period for only 2 days, now I'm off. I did give him permission to *** inside of me because I have an IUD and thought/think I am safe. So my period is completely over and just thinking about it I am getting kind of worried that I may have gotten pregnant. Now it is too soon to take the pregnancy test so please give good advise.

So I had a very bad night last night and tried to overdose but I did it on something I thought would work, but just kills bacteria. So I am still alive (obviously) and just wondering if I should worry. When I overdosed it was enough to kill the good bacteria in my stomach apparently and now I am wondering two things. (1) With the lack of bacteria is it bad that when I craved something spicy I went to our food court in the mall and got the spiciest food I've ever had. Will that do more damage? (2) Early this morning my bf was feeling frisky and put my anal beads in me and then we proceeded to do what we did, when I took the beads out after we finished I used the restroom and there was blood in my stool. I have never bled from my beads or anything. Could that be from once again the lack of bacteria or did I just totally mess my body up. I don't have insurance to go to the doctors and already have $5,000 in med bills. Please be serious with the answers. Thank you.

Almost every time my boy friend and I finish we are happy at the end but it all changes. I am wondering what makes me so angry? It happens about 30 minutes after and we could just be watching tv or just hanging out. Please serious answers nothing like, oh he isn't good enough or he doesn't know what he is doing. Thank you.

I started on September 20th and it goes away for a few days but comes back right away. It is almost November 1st and it would be nice to enjoy not having my period. So my questions are, why have I had it for so long? How can I make it stop? (So you can have an idea of my length off, maybe a week)

So I went out with one of my friends (He is married, I am engaged) we started fooling around in the back of his car. We did it for a very long time about 3 1/2 hours. Most of it was him fingering me and making me come quite a bit and me blowing him. We had some sex w.o a condom but after he dropped me off at home again I started to hurt a lot. My legs (I know the squatting on him) but as well as my side, and my vaginal lips are raw close to the anal region. The pain doesn't stop and it hurt down there when I have to use the bathroom. My boyfriend looked at it (told him over use of toys) and he said it looks irritated. What caused the irritation? Could it have been the coming or was it something else?

So three days ago I had my mom dye my hair for me, I was a natural brunette and went to black. After I went back to my house and it had dried I noticed that I had a few brown spots but today I noticed that it was more than a few spots. I don't think it looks right and don't want to wear my hair down now because of it. Is there a product that I can use to target the brown to a black color or do I have to redye? Any suggestions? I had friends go to a beauty school and they ruined their hair (never happened to me, but with this problem I am really worried about going to them (My hair has to look natural for my job)) And I don't really have too much money to go to a salon.

i was his first (we are both adults) but he said he liked it when girls came (via porn) so i started pushing and now am doubting that that is ***. but should i tell him? he is extremely picky on this subject and doesn't like talking about it. + he did something he has never done before and i think it was from what he did with his ex before we started going out but i still kinda have a problem with knowing that. what should i do? sorry its so long.

for some reason for the last week and a half i have had discoloration on the side of my eyes both. and this morning when i looked in the mirror there was brown on my eye lids and an orangish tint to the side of my eyes. when i got off of work today my bf told me to look in the mirror, thank god the brown was gone but there was so much orange he told me i should get a doctors apt. my mom said we shouldn't worry and we will wait until morning and see if it changes. should i be concerned and what could it possibly be?

my boyfriends mother gave me an ipod nano for christmas. it was only the ipod no cd or anything. how could i posibly get music onto the ipod? can i add music from limewire or somewhere? i have no clue on what to do and this is my first ipod.

ok im on the go alot and dont have time 4 very much eating what can i do 2 get my stomach 2 not do thoughs funny noises. please remember i am gone and very busy.

i cant shop online i dont have a credit card but where can i find a back corset thats tie. price please under $100 but its ok. i just cant find any places 2 buy it.

i was given a compaq notbook labtop and it just crashed. right now i have no money so now i was woundering if someone could help by instructions or a site that would tell me how i could fix it instead of going to specialist. which as i mentioned i dont have the money for, much thanks for all the help yall can give.

i got a necklace from my b/f but it has something on the back. it is in a different coding. i think it could be a different language but it may be greek. can some1 give me a site for this. it has symbols like square rooted. I><I its more like 2 flags touching. but can some1 give me a site or anything?

i am naming a star and need a different language